pregnant and applying to my dream job... need advice!

[lauraadora]

Hi all! Looking for some insight into a very specific situation... prepare yourselves, it's a little complicated haha.

 

Just a little background on my career so far: My first job as a PA was a procedural sub-specialty (pediatric interventional cardiology, i.e. cath lab) I launched into after rotating there as a student. I fell in love with it and didn't want to waste any time getting experience in something more general if I knew what I wanted. I worked there for almost 3 years and for the most part, loved my job. What made me decide to leave was a combination of a few things: my husband and I were both working at the same hospital and we both could feel a lot of changes coming (not for the better)... benefits were being cut every year, positions were being eliminated left and right, and it seemed like the hospital was gearing up for a buy-out or simply closing. In addition, I was not making nearly enough money compared to what I knew I could be making... I had accepted a lower salary knowing that it was what I really wanted to do, but at this point I knew I would never get a raise that would give me enough to make it worth it to stay. I also worked with a small group of people and the nursing staff were all checked out and I was getting tired of being the only one who had the patients' safety in mind (other than my supervising physician). The last straw was losing our CT surgery program which left the cath lab with significantly less volume. My husband and I decided to make a change and move to be closer to family.

 

When thinking about my career future, I would have loved another peds cath lab job, but my dream job would be pediatric CT surgery. Now both of these positions are very specialized and really only limited to major cities, and even the places that have it don't all use PAs. I looked for these types of postings, but there wasn't anything out there, which didn't surprise me. Instead, we figured it would be better to choose a location that had peds hospital for both of us and cath and CT surgery programs for me with the hope for something in the future, in the meantime accepting less than our dream jobs. My husband found the exact position he wanted and I found something related that would give me good experience - working with the same patient population but in a different capacity (cardiac ICU). I figured I could get myself in the door and hopefully work my way into a procedural position (cath or CT surgery) eventually. Now, 8 months into my new job in a new location, I find myself not loving it. I have noticed that this institution is very much a doctor's club and less a proponent of the APP model (at least in the inpatient setting). They seem to all be comfortable with the attending/fellow/resident relationship and don't include me the way that they should; nor do they see me as on the same level as a resident or fellow which is really frustrating. My position seems to be focused on note writing and ordering only, which sucks coming from a position where I was hands-on and had a lot of autonomy. When I spoke to the director of APPs about my feelings and the fact that I'm not loving this position, I asked about more procedural-based jobs and I was told "We don't use PAs in the OR at this hospital. The residents are the priority. That's just the way that it is here." Which is a completely frustrating thing to hear. It's not that I'm miserable in my current job (I'm good at it, I don't hate it but I don't love it), but I do find myself missing what I used to do and the respect and autonomy I was given. When I first started feeling like this, I told myself that I needed to give it more time - that once I got used to it maybe it wouldn't be so bad. Maybe I could prove myself and things would improve. My husband isn't loving his job either btw (for different reasons), but we told each other that unless we were miserable we would try to focus on home life and less on our careers; which btw is something I've never done. Not that I don't have a good work/life balance, but I've always been career oriented. Sooo we said "let's not put off starting a family any longer!" (Something we had done for 3 years while I was focusing on my last job.) I gave myself 6 months in my new job before we started trying... now I am 9 weeks pregnant and we are super excited about starting a family, although my feelings about my career remain the same.

 

So the reason for this post? Now that you have the background, I'll get to the point. After a particularly frustrating week at work, I did what every disgruntled employee does and I started looking for jobs. A blessing and a curse.... I found a posting for my dream job. In another city, after having just moved less than a year ago. And I'm 9 weeks pregnant. Shit... what do I do? Well I've got to apply, right?? It is my dream job after all. And when planning for after the baby comes, it will be me who still works full time and my husband who cuts back his hours to be home with the baby. So if I'm already not loving my job, I'm gonna love it less if I have to go and be away from my baby all day. Btw, we are renting, so a move would be a little crazy, but do-able.

 

My husband has been so supportive. He told me I should apply, so I am currently working on my cover letter and plan to submit in the next few days. But I have been asking myself, what do I do if I get an interview?? I'm not showing yet so it won't be obvious that I'm pregnant, but do I disclose it during the interview and risk not getting an offer? Or do I wait until after I get the offer and make them feel as if I was hiding it? Even if I could start ASAP, I know that credentialing will take 2-3 months and then I'd be starting when I'm 5-6 months pregnant, only to go out on maternity leave 3-4 months into the job. Ughh my brain is spinning. 

 

Anyone have any words of wisdom? Or even just words of sympathy? I keep going between excitement for the possibility to then immediate freak-out mode with trying to coordinate everything if I get the job. Any responses are greatly appreciated!! :) Ok, I'll stop typing now.

[SedRate]

That sounds very frustrating. Firstly, you don't have an interview yet and won't have one unless you apply. If it's the choice for you, then go for it. Legally, I don't believe they can ask you about your plans for pregnancy, your relationship, beliefs, etc. Sure, you can offer up the information yourself. You could handle the situation a few ways, as you've already touched on:

1. Tell them up front and risk them not taking you on for that reason. But what does that say about them?

2. Don't tell them and look like you're hiding it. But what does that say about you?

3. Perhaps withhold it initially and when discussing final details, tell them that you want to be transparent and explain the situation. Express your desire to be an asset to the company, continue your training while you're off on leave, etc.

[south]

Well, whatever you do, don't get married or get pregnant!  ha ha

 

I think I'm on team Go For It.  I mean let's face it.  The chances of you getting interviewed are slim anyway, let's say that a couple of other people apply.  One might be local with more experience, one might be something else ahead of you. 

 

So chances are kinda against getting anything and you can move on, but if you don't apply, you'll regret it.  And you don't need that right now.

 

So let's say you get an interview.  The question is when and how to bring up the issue?  Bit of a palaver.

 

If I was interviewing you, I would want to know right away.  IMHO only, I think it would be best at the end of the interview.  That way they have all the information and can go discuss it.  If they are just way against it, no way no how, then you have not wasted too much time and work as they choose a candidate.  

 

HOW you do it should be as mentioned..."here's my situation, what it means, and here's my plan to deal with it".  Offering to work a few hours here and there or study while you are off is a great idea.  You've a significant advantage in that Hubs is willing to shoulder the load for a while, not to mention move to accommodate you. Mention all of this as a comprehensive plan.  This shows initiative and planning.  

 

You don't mention it directly but I'm assuming this job is CT surgery...the thing is, there's a lot of money in that field and they may have a plan to back up providers that are out for one reason or another.  Where I worked, they sure did - there was this PA who had a company doing CT surgery first assist per diem - you call, she comes in for cases or a day or a week to fill in.  Expensive, but they had the money.  And MAN was she busy.

 

They may not think it's a big deal.  I don't know anything about being pregnant vs. working.  Bottom line...

 

Worst case:  "There's no way.  She can't work in the OR or in the hospital past a certain date, she'll be gone for OB appts, this is her first kid so she hasn't been through it before...we'd be hiring and paying a ghost until she returns from maternity leave, if she ever does...we have no guarantee about the husband taking over thing, she could easily change her mind...and then we are out like 10 months for nothing at all...forget it..."

 

Best case:  "This isn't bad.  She was up front with it and presented a plan, and it sounds solid to me.  It sounds like she is seizing a lifetime opportunity, so she should be really into this and work hard to get up to speed.  We can get her in here to get credentialed and stuff and familiar with the basics, maybe some pre- or post-op rounding or office.  We have a plan to cover the time we need in the OR anyway.  She has presented a plan to study and come in a few times while out on leave.  Then she is fresh and settled when she starts afterwards...otherwise qualified, great interview...willing to drop everything and move out here..."

 

Team Go For It

Sub-team End of Interview 

[greenmood]

Apply.

 

When you are interviewed, go through the entire day and get a sense for the fit. If you're reasonably sure they are going to offer you the job, tell them about the pregnancy in a matter-of-fact way.

 

"I'm so excited about this opportunity, and can't wait to work with all of you. In the interest of full disclosure, I am expecting a baby in _____ this year. I am very hopeful that won't affect your desire to work with me, since I am completely dedicated to this specialty and becoming an asset to your team."

 

I'm not a fan of excusing pregnancy or acting like it's some sort of giant inconvenience, but we all know some employers see it that way. TBH, it's not actually your "dream job" if they treat female employees like crap over pregnancy, so you're better off finding that out.

[ventana]

Okay

A dose of reality from a first time dad that waited into my mid 40's....

 

 

family life is awsome - totally changed my perspective.. No longer am I excited to muscle through 60 hour work weeks. As well at 15 years into my career I have no desire to not be autonomous in day to day practice.

 

So I have not found a place that pays me very well, I have a 3 day work week, and time at home......

 

 

I don't have a lot of advice for you other then DO NOT TELL THEM ANYTHING ABOUT BEING PREGNANT at this point - unless you simply don't want the job. HR will not admit it, but the chance of getting the job knowing that you are pregnant is unlikely (that hidden bias is there in many HR places, and I suspect CT surgery/cath lab is not the place for it from the head strong surgeon types.... but I have never worked in it.)

 

 

I know that I appreciated the fact my wife is home - and we are not schlepping the kid to 40-50 hours of day care a week (although we still do use day care).

 

 

I could see the arguement for staying at your job and focusing on yourself and family and keeping that info at hand for the "dream job" for after birth and leave (which if you can afford it I would say 6 months....)

 

Just my thoughts

[SedRate]

OP, do you have experience in CT surgery? Keep in mind that CT surgery can be a stressful field to work in and often entails lots of hours. Be prepared for that, especially as a new parent who's getting little sleep.

[rev ronin]

Your reproductive status is no one else's business, especially not an employer.

[Katera]

Your reproductive status is no one else's business, especially not an employer.

 

 

 

Disagree.  Interview and get the job without telling them you will be out indefinitely in a few months just about the time they get you trained, and you will poison the well for that job and perhaps references to come.  Like it or not, that is exactly the way they will see it.  

 

Tell them.

[chichamorada]

As a fellow woman who's starting a family early in a new job, I really sympathize with your situation.  I've been thinking a lot about how starting a family will pan out , how it will 'look' to my employer? will I be taken less seriously than my men-without-a-uterus colleagues?

The law states that they cannot ask about pregnancy or plans or family...and with good reason!!  Women are expected to be both caretaker and career-oriented these days, so the laws protect us women from being stigmatized as we try to juggle both things.  Your husband cannot become pregnant, and cannot breastfeed...ideal for an employer, right?  Wrong - we women have come too far, and feminism means not giving in to the male standard (i.e. "keep your pregnancy and your motherly duties out of our workspace")

 

Speaking of feminism, to me it goes both ways...why can't a male partner take the 'parental leave' for 6-8weeks so that you can feel a bit more freedom to pursue this new step in your career, even with a baby?  It's something you could bring up with your spouse, as he sounds super supportive.  BTW that's what breast pumps were made for :) so that you don't need to remained tethered at the nipple!

[south]

I do get the dissenters' arguments, even though we all know my opinions are always correct.  I mean, duh.

 

But I'll refer back in part to what Sed...said.  Here's just a guesstimated timeline...just making it up over what may be typical...

 

Today = 9 weeks

CV hits the inbox = 10 weeks

Phone interview with HR or manager = 11 weeks 

In person with the gang = 13 weeks 

Hear back yea or nay = 15 weeks

Filling out/signing paperwork and starting credentialing = 16-18 weeks

Moving = 20 weeks ish????

You show up ready to finish credentialing and start = 22 weeks ish????

 

Everyone's first thought is going to be "wow, she knew about it going in and didn't say anything".  Is that what you want?

 

Absolutely correct it is your right under the law to not reveal your status until you see fit.  But just because you can exercise a certain right does not mean it's automatically a good idea in every case.  I can give hundreds of examples where discretion = valor.

 

The definition of "awkward" might include someone who (essentially) sandbagged you into hiring them, and now you don't dare fire them for any reason.  Comfortable with that working relationship?  I know my personal answer to that question.

 

In other words, I'm with whomever said you'll find out what kind of people you're potentially working with.  

 

Please let us know how it turns out. 

[GetMeOuttaThisMess]

Assuming that there are other PAs in your department how will THEY feel having had picked up the slack before you even arrived (assuming that there was a predecessor, which BTW, I'd be asking in any interview "Why did they leave?").  You get hired and now you're going to be out for an extended time window?  Human nature says that that might not sit well when you need a favor down the road, and as a parent with a young child (yourself, not me, thank goodness), there will be those times.

 

More on a personal side, what happens if there are pregnancy complications warranting extended bedrest or NICU time, heaven forbid?  I've seen it happen recently.  I would say that it would burn bridges whether they tell you so or not.  Me, as a male, I'd deal with one situation at a time.  Get through the pregnancy first and if it's meant to be, the opportunity will present itself at it's perfect time.  One has to remember that they're looking out for THEIR best interests since it's a business and it isn't their priority to work around your needs/situation (sounds harsh but it is reality as others have expressed).

 

Look at the big, BIG picture and best of luck with your pregnancy and decision!

[lauraadora]

Wow, thank you all for such thoughtful replies!! I submitted my application yesterday so we'll see what happens... I'll keep ya posted!

 

I am a person that tends toward "honesty is the best policy" so I certainly wasn't planning on not saying anything until I started... just wanted to hear people's thoughts on when the best time would be and how to be most tactful with the news. I like some of your advice on presenting it as more matter-of-fact, with a plan on how to be most supportive to my potential new employer. I think as far as timing, it will depend on how (or if!) the interview process goes... whether I do it at the end of the interview day or wait until I have the offer. I am leaning towards the end of the day, but if I don't have any clue as to where I stand at the end of it, I'm not sure how confident I'll feel about sharing news that would make me a less desirable candidate. The position is at a huge teaching institution that has a team of 5 PAs already and the posting has been up for 5 months now (I certainly would have applied sooner had I known it were out there!), so I get the feeling they are willing to wait for the right candidate to come along and shouldn't have any problems with staffing in the meantime. That being said, I'd love to not waste time and jump right in if I get the offer, but if it would be better for them to wait until after I have the baby I would certainly be willing to postpone my start date. 

 

To answer some of your questions: yes, the job is in peds CT surgery (VERY rare to find a job posting in my geographic region). No, I don't have experience in that directly, but I already have an idea as to what that would entail and I would hopefully have a better idea if it was for me after an interview. I am aware that starting a family can change your views on your career, but I know myself and I am confident that I would never want a job where I feel a lack of respect as a PA and my duties surround writing notes and orders only... yuck. Even with family being my number one priority by a longshot, I still know that I'm going to have to be at work 40+ hours a week and I certainly don't want to be miserable while I'm there. I'm a better provider than that and I value all the work I've put into my career so far than to settle.

 

To give a little more insight into my husband and our relationship, he's a nurse. When talking about starting a family, we decided he could drop his status to per diem or part time while I work full time. Financially it makes the most sense for us, and I've always been more career-oriented between the two of us anyway. We haven't quite hammered out the details to the timing of maternity/paternity leave but I think that will depend on the policies at our current workplace. I don't expect a super long leave, but I am trying to be realistic in that I may have a C-section and need recovery time, and I will want at least a few weeks to get used to the new addition and new routines in our household. I'm thinking 6-8 weeks. Hopefully that seems reasonable if I get the offer.

 

Anyway, I really appreciate everyone's insight into my situation. Please feel free to continue to share :)

[GetMeOuttaThisMess]

A five month old posting raises some flags for me, especially if it is in a strongly desired setting.  Seems they would've been able to find someone else beforehand if it were that good of a job.

[BruceBanner]

Until you have an actual offer, there is no decision to make. Always remember that.

 

People get hung up on "should I apply, should I not?", like applying alone is the big decision.

 

Second, while honesty is courteous, telling an interviewer you are pregnant might preclude you from the job. I know, no one can legally discriminate, but they do, and can you blame them?

 

I'm my professional experience, female providers who get pregnant usually 1) take the maximum allowable maternity leave, and 2) always come back part-time. Not saying I blame them, but if I'm a hiring manager I see a pregnant lady as a potential poor ROI. Not telling them might get you the job, but you arent winning any friends. People can do the math and ascertain you were pregnant when you were hired. I've been the guy who picks up the slack for maternity leave now 3 times, and while it's a fact of life, let me tell you it gets easy to resent being placed in that position.

 

Not to mention your employer might feel like you pulled a con-job on them, and now they cant dare fire you for obvious reasons.

 

So if you get to the place of an interview, I would favor telling them. Legally and professionally it is private, but I can tell you if I was your employer or colleague and found out you pulled a fast one on us....it would be tough to recover from that. That's what's called a 'd!ck move'.

[SedRate]

Wow, thank you all for such thoughtful replies!! I submitted my application yesterday so we'll see what happens... I'll keep ya posted!

 

I am a person that tends toward "honesty is the best policy" so I certainly wasn't planning on not saying anything until I started... just wanted to hear people's thoughts on when the best time would be and how to be most tactful with the news. I like some of your advice on presenting it as more matter-of-fact, with a plan on how to be most supportive to my potential new employer. I think as far as timing, it will depend on how (or if!) the interview process goes... whether I do it at the end of the interview day or wait until I have the offer. I am leaning towards the end of the day, but if I don't have any clue as to where I stand at the end of it, I'm not sure how confident I'll feel about sharing news that would make me a less desirable candidate. The position is at a huge teaching institution that has a team of 5 PAs already and the posting has been up for 5 months now (I certainly would have applied sooner had I known it were out there!), so I get the feeling they are willing to wait for the right candidate to come along and shouldn't have any problems with staffing in the meantime. That being said, I'd love to not waste time and jump right in if I get the offer, but if it would be better for them to wait until after I have the baby I would certainly be willing to postpone my start date.

 

To answer some of your questions: yes, the job is in peds CT surgery (VERY rare to find a job posting in my geographic region). No, I don't have experience in that directly, but I already have an idea as to what that would entail and I would hopefully have a better idea if it was for me after an interview. I am aware that starting a family can change your views on your career, but I know myself and I am confident that I would never want a job where I feel a lack of respect as a PA and my duties surround writing notes and orders only... yuck. Even with family being my number one priority by a longshot, I still know that I'm going to have to be at work 40+ hours a week and I certainly don't want to be miserable while I'm there. I'm a better provider than that and I value all the work I've put into my career so far than to settle.

 

To give a little more insight into my husband and our relationship, he's a nurse. When talking about starting a family, we decided he could drop his status to per diem or part time while I work full time. Financially it makes the most sense for us, and I've always been more career-oriented between the two of us anyway. We haven't quite hammered out the details to the timing of maternity/paternity leave but I think that will depend on the policies at our current workplace. I don't expect a super long leave, but I am trying to be realistic in that I may have a C-section and need recovery time, and I will want at least a few weeks to get used to the new addition and new routines in our household. I'm thinking 6-8 weeks. Hopefully that seems reasonable if I get the offer.

 

Anyway, I really appreciate everyone's insight into my situation. Please feel free to continue to share :)

I don't have peds CT experience but I do have some adult CT experience. It often entails long surgeries requiring standing for 4-6+ at a time routinely. Is that similar to peds CT surgery? Difficult to do when pregnant and having to pee every 2 hours.

 

Anecdotally, I worked with a group that had a pregnant CT PA. Toward the end of her pregnancy, she would typically scrub out after the vein harvest to rest. She then scrubbed back in to help with the grafting. She ended up being bedridden for the last month of her pregnancy due to a complication, so they ended up hiring on first assists per case. She decided not to return to CT due to the hours/call and wanting to spend more time with her baby; she ended up going back to work in another field that allowed for that.

 

I encourage you to really think about your new family and starting a new job in a new field all at the same time. That's a lot to take on. CT surgery is often known for its long hours and stressful environment, which is something else to consider as well.

 

AndersenPA, care to share?

[SedRate]

Until you have an actual offer, there is no decision to make. Always remember that.

 

People get hung up on "should I apply, should I not?", like applying alone is the big decision.

 

Second, while honesty is courteous, telling an interviewer you are pregnant might preclude you from the job. I know, no one can legally discriminate, but they do, and can you blame them?

 

I'm my professional experience, female providers who get pregnant usually 1) take the maximum allowable maternity leave, and 2) always come back part-time. Not saying I blame them, but if I'm a hiring manager I see a pregnant lady as a potential poor ROI. Not telling them might get you the job, but you arent winning any friends. People can do the math and ascertain you were pregnant when you were hired. I've been the guy who picks up the slack for maternity leave now 3 times, and while it's a fact of life, let me tell you it gets easy to resent being placed in that position.

 

Not to mention your employer might feel like you pulled a con-job on them, and now they cant dare fire you for obvious reasons.

I also had to pick up the slack for a pregnant colleague. Thankfully only once so far. But that extra work never gets paid back, neither by the workplace nor colleague. I too started to develop resentment for that person who frequently took off work for appointments or left early because they weren't feeling well. It got old after a while. But that's life, I suppose.

[lauraadora]

I don't have peds CT experience but I do have some adult CT experience. It often entails long surgeries requiring standing for 4-6+ at a time routinely. Is that similar to peds CT surgery? Difficult to do when pregnant and having to pee every 2 hours.

 

Anecdotally, I worked with a group that had a pregnant CT PA. Toward the end of her pregnancy, she would typically scrub out after the vein harvest to rest. She then scrubbed back in to help with the grafting. She ended up being bedridden for the last month of her pregnancy due to a complication, so they ended up hiring on first assists per case. She decided not to return to CT due to the hours/call and wanting to spend more time with her baby; she ended up going back to work in another field that allowed for that.

 

I encourage you to really think about your new family and starting a new job in a new field all at the same time. That's a lot to take on. CT surgery is often known for its long hours and stressful environment, which is something else to consider as well.

 

AndersenPA, care to share?

 

Sed, your point on working in CT surgery while pregnant is a good one, but by the time I actually start, it will only be for a few months before I'm due. When I worked in a peds cath lab, I stood for cases that often lasted 3+ hours, all while wearing lead, sometimes with 2 or 3 cases in a day. My days were long, it certainly was a stressful environment, and I was lucky to get a break to pee, scarf down some lunch, or take a sip of water - but I loved it. Every minute of it. I understand what I'm getting into (for the most part) and while that type of work environment might be difficult when I'm heavily pregnant, it will only be for a few months. I assume that my future employer would expect most, if not all of that time to be part of an orientation process anyway and the job entails more than just OR time. In my, and other women's defense, there are surgeons and PAs that go through an entire pregnancy in that type of environment and find ways to cope, so it certainly can be done. As far as the work load post-pregnancy, I would rather handle that than feel like I'm not making a difference (i.e. in my current job).

 

BruceBanner, while that may be your experience with pregnant colleagues, going back part time is not an option for me. Between my husband and I, we have way too many student loans that we wouldn't be able to handle without my full salary. 

 

What I was more concerned about was starting a new position and going out on leave not even 6 months in. As I mentioned, I don't plan to take a very long leave but I do feel bad for the timing of everything. That being said, it's a job I've always wanted and I think I'd be crazy not to go for it just because the timing is inconvenient. Honestly, a pregnancy that I'm already part of the way through is a minor amount of time compared to the time I'm looking to spend in this position (which could be the rest of my career if it's a good fit for me).

 

And to GetMeOuttaThisMess, I certainly plan on asking during my interview why the posting has been up for so long. While it's a highly desired field for me, I don't know how many other PAs are out there who are involved or aware of this field. Peds sub-specialties tend to draw more NPs than PAs and this posting is specifically geared towards PAs. Maybe I'm just being optimistic, but I'm hoping they were just waiting for the right candidate. And I'm REALLY hoping that that's me! ;]

[SedRate]

Sounds like you're pretty set on this job. Good luck, and let us know what happens.

[AbeTheBabe]

My wife (not a PA, in HR) interviewed at a job before she knew she was pregnant. When she accepted the position, she knew (albeit for only a few days). She didn't say anything until she was past the first trimester (which was over a month into her new position). Obviously, you'll be farther along than she is so this may not work for you. As long as you're not showing or can hide it well during the interview I would not say anything. If they offer you the job, then sign the contract or offer letter after negotiations and tell them. That way, the pregnancy doesn't affect their decision about hiring you, but you are upfront with them after the decision has been made.

[ventana]

I also had to pick up the slack for a pregnant colleague. Thankfully only once so far. But that extra work never gets paid back, neither by the workplace nor colleague. I too started to develop resentment for that person who frequently took off work for appointments or left early because they weren't feeling well. It got old after a while. But that's life, I suppose.

Sorry but that is a pretty unfriendly to family - which you are a part of at home, or were a part of.

 

Yes sometimes the young family parent needs some time off, but we as a society WAY undervalue the value of parenting and spending time with our youngest citizens.

 

The OPs question is about applying for a job when she is pregnant.

[south]

 

female providers who get pregnant usually 1) take the maximum allowable maternity leave, and 2) always come back part-time. 

 

 

True.  Non-PC, but absolutely true.  I don't blame them either, I sure as hell would if I had to pass (and now care for) a 9-pound kidney stone.

 

Someone will be along shortly to argue this, but I've only seen it not happen once - and that was an ex-relative, a physician, who ended up losing her house and everything else in the crash of '08, and had to move back in with her parents so she literally had no choice.

 

I would add that I've also not yet seen a pregnant female work up until their projected date of departure, though I've heard of it secondhand.  Including my ex-wife and baby mama, both times.

 

Plus, there's that whole 85% female PA students 50% working female PAs thing.  Also fact, also non-PC.  It is what it is.

[south]

If they offer you the job, then sign the contract or offer letter after negotiations and tell them. That way, the pregnancy doesn't affect their decision about hiring you, but you are upfront with them after the decision has been made.

 

"Here is your signed offer back; I kept a copy. Now that I'm an employee, here is a situation that I willfully concealed from you.  This will cost you tens if not hundreds of thousands of dollars, hundreds of man hours, not to mention the cost of health care - all for zero return.  This is now your legal obligation under federal law and you will have to see this through.  Anyway, I really thought that concealing information that could damage or destroy your practice and your livelihood was the best way to start out my new career here." 

[SedRate]

Sorry but that is a pretty unfriendly to family - which you are a part of at home, or were a part of.

 

Yes sometimes the young family parent needs some time off, but we as a society WAY undervalue the value of parenting and spending time with our youngest citizens.

 

The OPs question is about applying for a job when she is pregnant.

 

I agree that we undervalue parenting. It's a job in and of itself. I think that's why most families end up having a stay-at-home parent to take care of those duties.

 

Friendly or not, I was hired to do a certain job. I wasn't hired to do another person's job too. All I was saying is that it really sucks when you are given even more work to do, especially when it is expected, uncompensated, unappreciated, and not repaid. Bruce and I were adding this for extra input on how the OP should approach the whole situation since her actions will be affecting her new co-workers as well. It doesn't seem like the greatest way start off a job.

[BruceBanner]

"Here is your signed offer back; I kept a copy. Now that I'm an employee, here is a situation that I willfully concealed from you.  This will cost you tens if not hundreds of thousands of dollars, hundreds of man hours, not to mention the cost of health care - all for zero return.  This is now your legal obligation under federal law and you will have to see this through.  Anyway, I really thought that concealing information that could damage or destroy your practice and your livelihood was the best way to start out my new career here." 

 

LOL!!

 

Taking a clinical job well into a pregnancy and not telling them---while one's legal right---is totally selfish and like I said, a d!ck move.

 

It would be like if I enlisted in the reserves right around the same time, didnt tell them, got the job, and then came around and said "surprise!! I'm off to basic or OTS or whatever equivalent for 3+ months. Thanks for your support. I know you'll have my job waiting when I get back---you have to".  (Maybe not a perfect analogy, but you get my drift.)

 

One last comment: all of the 15 or so female docs and PAs I work with have kids. With the exception of the ones with grown kids, NONE of them are full-time, and the ones with little kiddos are constantly taking days off or leaving early for kid issues.

 

None of this is to pile on the OP. Her choice. All I'm saying is if I was her employer or colleague and she pulled that---terrible way to start off your dream job.

[ventana]

I agree that we undervalue parenting. It's a job in and of itself. I think that's why most families end up having a stay-at-home parent to take care of those duties.

Friendly or not, I was hired to do a certain job. I wasn't hired to do another person's job too. All I was saying is that it really sucks when you are given even more work to do, especially when it is expected, uncompensated, unappreciated, and not repaid. Bruce and I were adding this for extra input on how the OP should approach the whole situation since her actions will be affecting her new co-workers as well. It doesn't seem like the greatest way start off a job.

 

 

Your job performance is not connected directly to another's - it is YOUR choice rather you want to do more or work your contract. (Remember I advocated for her to stay put as life changes after kids)

This is a short coming you have with defining limitations to what you will take on. You are not a practice owner and therefore you have no obligation to do another's job

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

LOL!!

 

Taking a clinical job well into a pregnancy and not telling them---while one's legal right---is totally selfish and like I said, a d!ck move.

 

It would be like if I enlisted in the reserves right around the same time, didnt tell them, got the job, and then came around and said "surprise!! I'm off to basic or OTS or whatever equivalent for 3+ months. Thanks for your support. I know you'll have my job waiting when I get back---you have to". (Maybe not a perfect analogy, but you get my drift.)

 

One last comment: all of the 15 or so female docs and PAs I work with have kids. With the exception of the ones with grown kids, NONE of them are full-time, and the ones with little kiddos are constantly taking days off or leaving early for kid issues.

 

None of this is to pile on the OP. Her choice. All I'm saying is if I was her employer or colleague and she pulled that---terrible way to start off your dream job.

Why do you think there is LEGAL protections against these things?? Do you think it is because the gov't wants to punish employers for hiring women? I think not. These are in place as we live in a civilization which has laws and regulations in place to protect those that need protecting. If they were not in place you could have every female take a urine preg test in order to be hired, and then make NOT getting pregnant a stipulation of the job......

 

There already is a wage gap even with protections in place about overt discrimination. i can't even begin to explain that as it is not my area - but I do know making the OP feel bad about being pregnant and calling is a D*** move only shows a lack of understanding on the true issues facing society. To go off point a little bit 0 this country of ours so over values personal freedoms that we tend to go to the point of screwing up society over it. There really should be some societal good which is required for programs. IE I am a strong supporter of welfare IF they did utox testing (and a positive utox looses your benefits) and the said "if you want your check you have to work 30 hours per week for the (state or Feds). Show up at 'such and such' a place ready to shovel, rack, move snow and manual labor. Think Civilian Conservation Corps (CCC). Then society is helping itself through supporting those in a rough time, but no totally free handouts for just breathing. And if you want to shot dope and smoke crack - well then check into a treatment, get clean and then get out and go on welfare and get a job....

Sorry off topic there..

 

 

 

 

The point is that individual stories are just that , and there is reasons why we as a society have set up legal protections for pregnancy. It is just wrong to discriminate for that as their is simply no way for human beings to last beyond one generation unless someone is procreating......

 

As for the comments of 15 or so doc's that work part time - I have had the opposite experience - all my female doc friends are the primary bread winners, and work their tails off - they are senior partners, business managers and the like..... So simple local personal stories hold little value....

 

And the comments about enlisting (well it would be a commission) in teh reserves and not telling them. Well that is just stupid. The higher thing we ALL should be protecting is our country. As a Vet I actually take offense to this comment and it was me putting my life on the line for 4 years (okay not literally as I never got deployed - but I could have been) so that you could sit at home and be safe. If someone wants to pony up to join the reserves then they ahve EVERY RIGHT and the employer gets to deal with it. I guess after all this is a GREAT example of why we SHOULD protect the reserves and childbearing the same.....

 

 

 

As for the OPs specific situation - Once again I would advocate for her to stay put, not due to the future job, but instead due to the fact that life will change after the birth of her child. She might be the primary bread winner, she might go to work full time, she might decide to stay at home, who knows......