Nervous about leaving job

[GMM2019]

I'm about a year out of school. I'm not super happy about where I work currently, and I don't have any close friends or family here. In terms of "mental health", I'm probably at my lowest point. For the first time ever in my life, I've had to see a psychiatrist - things got that bad. I'm really, really lonely here and I'm getting so burnt out at work. 

I'd really like to move back to my home state, but I'm having a lot of trouble with the job search process. It's really difficult to schedule interviews in another state around my current work schedule, and prepare for the interviews, travel, dry clean suit, network, apply for more jobs, etc. Job searching has turned into another full time job on my free days. At work, I'm often doing 13-15 hour days (supposed to just be 12 hours), with barely any free time to check e-mail or return phone calls during week days. I'm doing the best I can to juggle everything, but I feel so trapped here.

I've thought about just quitting my current job so I can focus all of my attention on job searching... but I'm too scared to actually pull the trigger. A lot of places in my home state keep telling me I'm still a "new grad" even with a year of experience, and won't consider me any further. Also, I'm scared about having long gaps in between jobs because it might make me less marketable or get me in trouble with credentialing. My home state is a difficult place to get a job since there are so many PAs and NPs there already... 

So, I'm not really sure what to do... stay here and continue to be miserable or take the risk and quit. I'm a little nervous I won't be able to get another job in my preferred state with just my one year of experience... At this point, I don't even care about the salary or specialty. Is it too risky to quit without another job lined up? Will not having a current job affect me when applying for jobs? 

 

Thanks for any life advice! 

[thinkertdm]

Yes, have another job in hand.  I understand it's dark now, and may get darker, but please hold on.  

[sas5814]

Generally, except in extreme circumstances, I advise have a place to go before you leave. Its stressfull now but imagine quitting your job and then taking way too long to find a new one. Unemployed and broke is way worse than employed and unhappy.

Fatigue makes cowards of us all.

[SoCalPA]

What specialty? That matters

[PAofPlenty]

I was (and for the next 65 calendar days..still am) in your situation. 

I was given the bait and switch of a job in a state that was far away from home (i.e. lied at my interview about my job in person). For your reference, I was essentially made to be a resident assistant at a large academic teaching hospital where I would be given patients "follow-up" by residents and left to do mostly scut work/baby sitting/dealing with difficult patients. I was given little medical training (although promised some), little room for growth (became a one-trick medical pony), and spent 8 hours a day in a damn near abuse/abrasive environment where the residents would dump on me and my attending would openly talk down on APP's. They put the mask over me in the beginning by stating I should "shadow for a while to get the ropes." This was a ploy to ensure I spent enough time to make it uneasy on my resume if I would quit.

After work, I would sit in my car and ruminate: "If this is what being a PA is, I made a horrible mistake." I was devastated. The student loan burden along with this daily hell made me fantasize about joining the French Foreign Legion and disappearing.

But, then I realized: I work 8 hours for them. When I get home, I will work 8 hours for myself! I started applying to jobs and throwing out my resume. I got a few interviews back in my old state and politely requested phone interviews. I stated that I was moving back to be closer to my family and nearly all obliged my requests. Yes, it is risky doing phone interviews. Yes, it is better to meet in person. Yes, you will feel like crap at times. Yes, after one year of work experience...you are still a new grad. But...you also don't have any bad habits ingrained and you have a clean PA license.

I applied to a surgery job at my home town Veteran's Hospital on a whim. I interviewed and thought they would move on with another candidate with more experience than me.

I start in 65 days in my dream field, in my home town, with a written contract that I am happy with, and I get to help my fellow veterans with their surgical needs.

When I gave my professional notice, I walked out that day with a smile. My boss couldn't believe it and they were dumbfounded (teaches them to pull that horseshit...assholes).

Embrace the suck and realize that your best learning moments and moments of resilience are from being in the shit...neck deep in shit. Grit your teeth, remain professional (as possible), and apply. It worked for me. It will work for you. 

[MT2PA]

It's easier to get a job when you already have one.  You're right to hesitate leaving one without having the next lined up.  Frankly, I wouldn't.

Being frustrated with the time you have available to search now is likely better than the stress you'll feel about worrying about employment gaps, finances, etc if you quit.

[Guest Paula]

How many days a week do you work?  You have 12-15 hour shifts so if you work 3 days a week (which would be full time) then you have lots of free time to heal from the abuse you are getting from your job.  At least it sounds sorta abusive and under -utilization of a PA. 

Do you have a contract? Can you go to your supervisor and talk about your dissatisfaction with the job and ask for other opportunities?  You would need to figure out how to approach that type of conversation.  Such as:  You are ready for increased responsibilities and growth, would like to do x,y,z, etc.  

Good luck, it will all work out eventually.  Also, you need to find some good friends. 

 

 

 

[Cideous]

^^^ and a good therapist/counselor.  

Honestly, I think it should be a mandatory benefit for all healthcare providers.  Kind of like how police have access to one.

[FrankB]

I was in the same situation and mentally could not continue  with my last job, so I quit after 9 months.   I was applying elsewhere prior to quitting, but couldn't bring myself to continue.  I'm still unemployed several months later with few prospects and a decision whether or not to return to nursing, as I still have my license and can get a job tomorrow.

I'm just thankful my wife has a great job and we were financially responsible prior to me quitting. On the bright side unemployment has allowed me to take some epic trips that wouldn't be possible if I were working, so it isn't all bad. I don't regret my decision to quit, but I do wish I had another position lined up.

[narcan]

I've done multiple interviews on Skype prior to committing to flying out for an in-person interview. Screen jobs the best you can and then schedule a few over 2-3 days. I'd highly recommend going and seeing the facility and meeting the docs you'll be working with face-to-face before taking a job.

Like others have said, don't quit your day job without something in place unless you truly can afford to go 6 months or more without a paycheck.

Definitely find a good therapist/counselor. I don't know much about the online apps, but it might be worth it in the short-term, especially if you're so overworked you can't make it to traditional appointments and need the day-to-day availability of someone to talk to.