Jump to content

Please Review, anything helps!


Recommended Posts

Dormant viruses remain within a human host until the proper conditions for activity are present.  Under the right conditions, the virus can cause an outbreak but will eventually return to its dormant state. In some cases, the virus can completely take over the host. My path to becoming a physician assistant has been similar to that of a dormant virus. My first outbreak was in high school. I was sitting in the back of the quiet classroom, focused on my assignment when I heard a loud commotion. I looked up to see a student on the ground. Instantly, I ran over to him while everyone else, including the teacher, remained motionless. He was having a seizure. I dropped to the ground and held him in my arms. My instincts took over. I kept him on his side and protected his head. Paramedics arrived shortly after and thanked me for acting so quickly. After this outbreak it should have been apparent that I was meant for some sort of medical job but the virus quickly returned to its dormant state.

 

After high school, I began taking college courses while working at an animal hospital. This was my second outbreak; I loved working at the animal hospital. Although treating the animals was the main priority, forming relationships with the clients was of vital importance. A favored responsibility of mine was client education. This gave me a chance to have direct human interaction by teaching clients how to care for their pet at home. Demonstrations included diabetes management, medication administration, subcutaneous fluid therapy, outpatient recovery and physical therapy. Clients appreciated that I was able to clearly explain treatment or procedures in a way that they could easily understand. During my time at the animal hospital I also formed a respectable relationship with the doctor. Working for him was like getting paid for learning. He took every opportunity to explain and teach the details of a disease or diagnosis. I cherish the skills and experience I gained from the animal hospital. However, becoming a veterinarian was not my goal.

 

Upon completion of my bachelor’s degree, I took an office job. This was my third outbreak. It did not take me long to realize that an office job was not stimulating enough for my mind.  I realized that I love patient care as well as the culture and environment of the health care field. I started researching what I could do with my degree. Reflecting back on my “outbreaks,” I knew that I needed to be in the medical field. I did not want to be a nurse because the diagnostics and analytical aspects of medicine were so interesting to me. I came across the role of a physician assistant and was instantly attracted. I reached out to a local doctor and he agreed to let me shadow at his office. When I arrived at the doctor’s office, I instantly felt like it was where I was meant to be. I was able to go into exam rooms with the PA on staff and observe how she diagnosed and treated patients. She was personable with the patients and took her time to listen in order to form a relationship with them. Being in the office was natural to me; the doctor noticed this and invited me to do rotations at a couple of nursing homes with him and the PA the next day. It was this experience that caused my “virus” to become permanently active. I had never felt such satisfaction, not even at the animal hospital. The patients at the nursing home were so happy to see both the doctor and the PA. It was obvious that they had really made a difference in the lives of the patients. They worked as a team, going into different rooms and examining the patients, always communicating back and forth about different issues. The relationship between the doctor and PA reminded me of my relationship with the veterinarian. She was able to ask the doctor any questions pertaining to the patient, in which he would explain the details thoroughly. 

 

My future as a PA has become apparent under the perfect conditions. I have never felt so good about a career path. Becoming a PA will allow me to use my analytical mind to diagnose patients. My creativity will be utilized by thinking outside of the box to come up with innovative treatment plans. Having a physician above me to look to for guidance is ideal to me. My mind is always open to other opinions and will always value the input of the supervising physician. The versatility of the PA career is ideal for me and will satisfy my forever-growing urge to learn something new.  After reflecting on the outbreaks throughout my life, I can say with confidence that the “PA virus” has fully awoken from its dormant state and will remain active. 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

To be frank, I did not like the opening sentence; however, I do understand the purpose of why you wrote it and eventually made connection to each of your paragraphs. I know it is the overall "theme" of your essay and you'd have to almost have to change everything if you do decide to disregard your initial theme.

 

I definitely enjoyed reading your experiences and how/what you learned from each. Aside from your animal hospital work, I don't know if you have any other "direct patient care" experience. I did not learn anything that would make you a great PA (I apologize for being too frank). Otherwise, it is a great start. Keep working on it and re-post again if you'd like.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thank you guys for your feed back. I know the virus theme is different but isn't that what they are looking for? I get so bored reading other peoples personal statements because they are all the same... I feel as if i was able to incorporate some creativity and I think that will make me stand out from others. Right?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Yes, I completely get what you're trying to say but you don't have to make it all Hollywood-like type of movie to catch their attention. I usually tend to like reading statements that tell their OWN story and what they're learned from them and ultimately brought them to the PA career. I'm not an expert, but those are the ones that usually stand out to me.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

No, this will not do.  You won't get past the first paragraph or a reviewer reading it.

 

Everyone is so focused on the catch that they think its the only thing that matters.  It isn't.  But in this instance, it is.  There is no catch.  A PA or someone else reviewing your app essay have no interest in reading about how herpes viruses work.  This is akin to reciting that you want to be a PA because (insert latest AAPA byline as to what PAs do). 

 

Change it up.  Or it won't work.

 

G
 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Welcome to the Physician Assistant Forum! This website uses cookies to ensure you get the best experience on our website. Learn More