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PA Essay

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Is there a PA or admissions committee member on here that I can PM my essay to review please?  I have been working on it for weeks and I still can't pull it together into a perfectly crafted essay. 


I bought the online book from insidepatraining.com last night re: writing essays, which has been helpful, but I feel like I need an expert to let me know what they think.


Key points I have for my essay:


1. My experiences growing up in an underserved area (rural Iowa) and living abroad as an adult in 2 separate countries helped shape the values I developed and the person I would become. 


2.  My experiences working as a paralegal within personal injury and family law afforded me unique experiences.  Personal injury:  I reviewed medical records, talked to clients about their physical recovery.  Family law:  I dealt with clients/opposing parties with mental illness and substance abuse problems.  I reviewed drug screens and reviewed court-ordered psychological and psychological reports.  Spent time cross-referencing the DSM-IV.


3. My family's illnesses changed their lives and had a profound impact on my own.  (Father had 3 heart attacks, sister diagnosed with schizophrenia).  This made me interested in healthcare.  It also made me aware of the need for PAs in rural medical treatment.


4.  I went back to school took pre-reqs, gave up a comfortable lifestyle, and got a job at a hospital that has provided me with valuable patient care experiences.


5.  My shadowing experiences helped me see how I can utilize the skills honed within the legal field, as a PA.


Help please!

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