PS!! ALL HELP AND CRITICISMS WELCOMED--in need of your advice :)

[sammyvo]

There I was in the middle of the sea, atop a ship, staring into the dark abyss and upon the brightest starlit sky. This is beautiful, I thought to myself as I gazed out at the vast North Pacific Ocean. It was out here, on the far side of the world, where I found my true calling and decided that I would come back one day to set up my own health clinics to those less fortunate around the globe. Last summer, I embarked onto the T-AH 19 USNS Mercy Hospital ship and participated in a humanitarian mission in Indonesia that left a lasting impression on my views of health-care and ultimately, led me to my decision to become a physician assistant.

 

 

I was sitting in a small 10 x 10 room with three providers and a line of over a hundred patients from Ambon village waiting to be seen when I was convinced that this was the correct career path for me. I watched as Dr. Mitchell an OB/GYN sat down with each patient and made her assessments through an individually tailored set of questions. Her genuine desire to help these women shined through her every action. She greeted patients in the traditional Indonesian way; held their hand in hers and moved it towards her heart and said “Assalamo Alaikum,” which means, “may peace be upon you and may God's blessings be with you.” She went beyond the normal callings of a healthcare provider and was concerned with the general well being of her patients. I remember holding tightly onto the hand of a woman who had been both sexually and physically abused by her husband and listening in admiration as Dr. Mitchell advised the patient with compassion to leave home and to seek help from family and friends. She broke down in tears as she continuously kissed my hand and thanked Dr. Mitchell and I. I was struck with an overpowering sense of emotional reward and felt empowered ensure this type of care to all patients.

 

 

On the ship I had the privilege of working with orthopedic surgeon, Dr. Provencher. I remember checking the surgery schedule and saw that we were scheduled for an incision and drainage of the shoulder. I followed the doctor to see the patient before surgery. I assured her that we were going to do our best to help her get better and she looked up at me with her large brown eyes and gave me a nervous but trusting nod. The patient was a sweet little 5-year-old girl who broke her arm while playing on the monkey bars; without proper medical attention the wound healed on it’s own and had developed a large infected abscess that punctured through her little arm. During the surgery, I observed the efficient teamwork in the operating room; from the surgical nurse noting off the surgery checklist to the anesthesiologist properly intubating the pediatric patient and the surgical technician meticulously handling the instruments while maintaining the sterile environment. I held the arm in place as the surgeon made the incision, and held my breath as a huge amount of blood and pus was drained from the tiny arm that I was holding up. I helped suction the excess fluid and passed sterile instruments to the surgeon as he repositioned the broken humerus and sutured up the wound. A few days later, I saw the patient during post-operative rounds and saw that she was recovering well from the surgery. It was truly gratifying to know that I was part of a team effort that had successfully treated this young girl’s arm and to see the task through from beginning to end.

 

 

I was at a clinic in Soasi where my eyes were open to the reality of health-care in these impoverished populations. I was assigned to help Dr. Dorey with his pediatric patients. My premature excitement of being able to work with the children was quickly diminished once I realized that there was very little that could be done for many of these children. I was upset that many of these problems could have easily been prevented with simple vitamin supplements, basic medications or even just a pair of shoes. Dr. Dorey saw the look of discouragement in my eyes and told me that we had come for a reason and we were going to do our best to help these people. And it was true; throughout the mission we had treated over 109,000 patients, performed over 800 surgeries, issued over 60,000 pairs of glasses and supplied tons of vitamins and medications. Needless to say, we also passed out bags upon bags of toys to all the kids.

 

 

Since my return from the ship I have been fortunate to gain further invaluable experiences. Working as a medical assistant, I am able apply the compassionate care that I admired in Dr. Mitchell to my patients on a regular basis. My volunteer work at the local soup kitchen for the homeless community reminds me that there are many underserved people in the world and that it is my duty to do my part in society, and it reinforces my desire to open my own health clinic for those who do not have access to proper healthcare. I have changed seeing the moon shine on the far side of the world and will one day return to see it again.

[PAgirl21]

wow this is a great essay... all i have to say is that i hope we're not applying to the same schools lol... but really i enjoye reading it. i also put an international spin on my essay, but i like your personal stories... makes you stand out and makes the PS more authentic. good luck

[GatorRRT]

While your experience abroad is impressive, you don't address why you personally want to become a PA, other than the first sentence in the first paragraph. To me, this essay could easily be used for admittance to medical school, respiratory school, nursing school, etc....If your true goal is to set up health clinics for the impoverished around the globe, won't MD be more appropriate? I'm just playing devil's advocate, not trying to be rude.

[alleycat]

what the gator said.

[Just Steve]

I too echo the Gator.

 

 

 

Why were you on the ship? What role were you performing there? I was under the impression that the USNS Mercy is staffed by the US Navy. Your essay sounds like you were there as a casual observer. Being former Navy corpsman and serving a little time on the USNS Comfort, I am curious of what you did while on board. Why does it matter what I am curious about you ask? Because you never know who is the AdCom reading your essay. It could be someone I was serving with, who may have the same curiosity about what you were doing.

 

 

 

Your story had a great background but it wasn't about you. All I know is that you shadowed on a ship overseas. While cool in it's setting, it's lackluster in it's content. Talk more of what you specifically did. What PAs did you shadow? What were they doing? All this doctor talk makes me feel that PA is just a back up plan for you.

[sammyvo]

I volunteered as a medical intern with a NGO group that consisted of doctors, dentists, nurses and pre-dental/pre-med students. We worked alongside the Corpsman. I know that it's heavy on the physicians but that's because there weren't many PAs on the ship but I felt that this was a great healthcare experience for me and it really showed me that I wanted to pursue the healthcare field -- as a "provider." It's really frustrating trying to explain why I want to be a PA without sounding like I backed down from med school. I chose PA school for its flexibility and because I want to have a great career serving people (as a healthcare provider) without sacrificing family.

 

I did much more than shadow on the ship, but I can't fit all my experiences of a month into 5000 characters. I wanted more to show what I learned from these doctors and these experiences.. and not necessarily what types of medical procedures I got to do. I could list things like.. sutures, incisions, vaccinations, drilling screws into a man's femur.. but I wanted to exude to how I want to be a compassionate provider.

 

Does this make any sense? I'm just stressed out because this thing is due tomorrow.. and I don't want the AdComs to think that I chose PA because I gave up on med school.