TarheelGirlx3 Posted February 22, 2013 Share Posted February 22, 2013 So, long story short, I lost my mother to leukemia this past October. She was at the hospital of my university, and so I was able to be there with her quite often. She had almost every kind of doctor imaginable, including PA, DOs, and NPs. I was able to make my best grades since things have happened and even in the midst of it all. Obviously I want to use this to talk about what I have overcome, how it made me stronger, etc. ....you get the picture. I know its imperative to avoid the cliches, however, and don't want focus on that as my sole motivation for wanting to become a PA. I wanted to work with children for a while, but didn't know in what aspect. I know I want to work within pediatrics, but how could I use this at my personal statement? Is saying that being around my mother's healthcare team, seeing their teamwork, collaboration with other healthcare professionals, etc. seem appropriate to decide medicine? Also, wWould it be bad to say I wasn't sure if medicine was right for me until I saw it all play out in front of me? Will this make me sound unsure, as if I am just going on a whim? Advice please and thank you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GreatChecko Posted February 22, 2013 Share Posted February 22, 2013 I'm very sorry for your loss. Losing a parent is always life changing, but it's good to see that it has led you to a positive place. As for your essay. I'm a fan of stories. You have to grab the attention of whoever is reading your essay in the first paragraph and make them want to continue reading and want to meet you. They read hundreds of essays, so you have to stick out. I think you have very fertile ground to work from. However, I would not say that you were unsure, but rather that you had one of those "that's when I knew experiences." You are saying the same thing, but if someone is speed reading, you want them to see "I was sure" not "unsure." What I would do is try to think of an experience with a PA that really sticks out and tell a bit of that story, don't start with telling them of your mother, but build the story and then tell them the unfortunate end. The other important thing (IMO of course) is to make sure and apply what you saw to yourself, don't just tell of what you saw, but why you liked it and how you see yourself working within that "teamwork, collaboration," compassion, etc. You need to sell that you understand what a PA is and that it is for you. Definitely tell them how it made you stronger and better, but don't leave it at that, tell them how it will make you an awesome PA. Best of luck! Checko Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TarheelGirlx3 Posted February 26, 2013 Author Share Posted February 26, 2013 Well, I have not shadowed a PA yet (will be after graduation) and will soon be shadowing a doctor. So, do you think my intro could be an event that happened with my mom that was that "AHA" moment? ..then go into what I liked, how it makes me a good candidate, show that I know about the PA profession, etc. Or alternately, should I use a story from working with children (to be my intro), which is my passion, and use that how I want to go into pediatrics? Just don't want my mother's illness to come off as a cliche, even though in all honesty it weighed significantly in my decision. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andreasmo Posted March 7, 2013 Share Posted March 7, 2013 In my opinion, it was a lot easier to just type out everything I wanted to say and edit it/ piece it together to make it coherent and get advice after it was written. I think your essay needs to tell what you want it to-- whether it be passion, strength, or direction (or even a mix of things). I have read a lot of personal statements for friends/ colleagues in all different fields, and that's the issue I have run into the most. Just make sure no matter what to keep the topic as why you want to be a PA and you can worry about the cliches later. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
atheaslet Posted March 26, 2013 Share Posted March 26, 2013 I wouldn't worry about the cliches. Your story is personal, so as long as you are telling it with your "voice" it will come out not sounding cliche Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
atheaslet Posted March 26, 2013 Share Posted March 26, 2013 I wouldn't worry about the cliches. Your story is personal, so as long as you are telling it with your "voice" it will come out not sounding cliche Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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