jennylewlv Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 Hi Everyone, My PA program starts July 2011. I am no stranger to the medical field and have worked in Oncology Reserach for the past 6 years, however, I am feeling very nervous about starting a vigorous PA program while trying to balance being a good mother to my 3 year old daughter and a good wife to my husband. Any tips or feedback from other PA Student Moms (or Dads!)? Thank you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YaelS Posted May 28, 2011 Share Posted May 28, 2011 Hi Jenny, I hope you get some responses from students who have been there! I am not in PA school (yet) but I'll share a few of the things that have worked for my family as I've been taking prereqs, working fulltime and taking care of 2 kids. It sounds like you are no stranger to the working world so a lot of this you probably already know and have already established... 1. Find awesome childcare with flexible and extended hours and develop good relationships with your childcare providers. I don't know what I would do without my amazing daycare provider. 2. Have a back-up childcare plan and make a game plan for what to do when kids are sick. I would imagine that in PA school days off are pretty much unacceptable. I feel the same at my job but unfortunately my kids didn't get the memo and are sick a lot. We have no family nearby so we are often in a bind with this. I think its just important to have a good plan in place that both you and your husband are onboard with. 3. Embrace technology...I take notes in class on a software program that automatically syncs to my iphone. This allows me to be studying anytime I have a minute or two (e.g. in line at the grocery store). 4. Steamline the household - cook and freeze meals on the weekends, etc. You probably know this stuff already :) 5. Let go of any guilt! Doing this now will enable you to have a great and satisfying career later, and following your dreams is an excellent way to be a good role model for your daughter. Thats all I have...hopefully other actual PA students can offer better advice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phreddah Posted May 28, 2011 Share Posted May 28, 2011 Hey Jenny- I am in my 3rd semester of PA school ( almost done with didactic!! ), and I have a wife and a 3 year old. TIME MANAGEMENT is the key! You have to schedule in advance and stick to it, no matter how sick or tired you are. Every spare second I have between classes I am reading notes/lectures. My situation is a little unique ( I am not sure of your husbands work schedule), my wife is an RN and works weekends only ( 7am - 9pm) so there is no daycare issue. But, I get hosed on weekends when my wife works and I cannot study for exams on Mondays!!! So M - F, I am gone 7am until 6pm ish, and then I have to study - but only after we cook dinner together as a family and eat together -- then study!!!! You CAN definitely do it! You just have to PLAN, PLAN, PLAN. You just need to find what works for your family. Let your husband know that PA school does demand a lot of your time -- so he is not in culture shock with all of your time you need to dedicate to classes. My wife was a little freaked at first when I was gone so much. And cherish this next month or so you have with your family. I took the whole summer off before I started, and we spent a lot of time together! But once again, you can do it!!! Good luck and feel free to PM me if you ever have any questions! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Steve Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 I am a dad of 3 little ones, husband, and starting PA school July 5. For the past 18 months I've been going to school full time and working full time. The kids, even though they are ages 5 (twins) and 7, have been involved in the talks about my current path. I am fortunate as my wife is a very supportive woman and is super stoked about me furthering my education and improving my long term career options. The kids miss me but they seem to comprehend what is approaching. I will be living away from the house Monday through Friday and commuting home on the weekends. They know, they are not happy about it, but seem to understand that when it is all over, Dad will be around MUCH more and we'll have a little more freedom to do cool things like go to the movies or water park. We break it down into time frames they can digest and track...Summer to Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving to Xmas, Xmas to Spring Break, Spring Break to summer. The kids will all be in school themselves so their daily lives will be wrapped up in school, home, play a bit, then dinner bath, story and bed. The weekends will be here before they know it and hopefully I can be free of homework so I can spend those 48 hours with them. I am super nervous about it all too, but we just have to believe in this path and that it will all work out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EMSArtist Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Disclaimer: I'm not a PA-S yet. One of the ideas I've been kicking around for when I get to PA school is to locate 2-3 other parents and form a babysitting group. Once a month one couple will take all the kids for 3-4 hours while the other couples get a date night. The parents would rotate so that everybody gets to take a little time with their SO for free. Like I said, just an idea I've been kicking around. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jennylewlv Posted May 31, 2011 Author Share Posted May 31, 2011 Hi Everyone, Thanks for your messages and tips. I especially enjoyed the "let go of guilt" from YaelS. It will be an interesting ride! Just Steve- are you starting Touro, Nevada July 5th? Just wondering becuase that my first day too! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Steve Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 Nope jenny, U of W/Medex Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onefastchick Posted July 3, 2011 Share Posted July 3, 2011 Hi Jenny, I am only 6 weeks in to my first semester of PA school but I am a military wife and mother of two kids (13 y/o and 3 y/o). It has been an adjustment thus far and I have had trouble letting go of my guilt but I must say the advice above is essential. 1. Let go of the guilt, you are doing this not only for yourself but for you family 2. Pre-planning and scheduling is key - make sure that dinner is planned for, try to study as much as possible during "regular business hours" and pick a time of day when you can just be mom, maybe have breakfast together or dinner together or bedtime routine if you have late classes 3. Be flexible! I know I said schedule everything but things come up, kids get sick, classes get moved to another time, a big test/quiz requires you to study more... you have to be able to quickly adapt and come up with a plan B 4. One evening/day in the weekend should be dedicated to family time, I choose to not study at all on Friday nights and spend that time with my hubby and kids either at home or going bowling or to a movie - this is a necessary release for me after a long week of studying 5. Be thankful to your spouse for stepping up and picking up your slack so you can study more often Hope this helps, I know you start on Tuesday, best of luck to you and remember you are not alone on this journey! Jen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JMHB Posted July 11, 2011 Share Posted July 11, 2011 Wow. I am glad I came across this part of the forum! I am a mom to a 2 1/2 year old, and I am agonizing on how I am going to do this! My husband is so supportive, he agreed that I should get a room to rent M-Thurs to saturate myself in school and studying, and then come home on the weekends to spend some time with the family. I live less than an hour away from school, but I just feel that the time commuting I could be studying (or sleeping!), and I wouldn't get distracted by my precious little one. Hmmm, nice to know that there are other brave mommies out there!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boatswain2PA Posted July 12, 2011 Share Posted July 12, 2011 Single dad of 3 just starting the 2nd year. Here's my advice. 1. Getting a "B" on a test (or in a class) is, indeed, good enough. 2. Remember-you are doing this for your kids. So if you have to put down the book for a kid event, then do it. 3. Coffee is a very, very good thing! 4. Pray, because you're going to need it. 5. Don't forget to carve a little bit of time out for yourself. 6. Lastly - remember it will be over soon, keep your eye on the prize. Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kevhow2001 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 I'm not a student yet, but as a husband and a father of two young ones, I have researched it quite a bit in preparation. A co-worker who is about to graduate, as well as a current PA that I work with, both gave me very stern advice regarding our spouses during PA school. Both relayed to me the increased marital distress that many of their classmates experienced during the program, and how several even ended up divorced. Basically, remember that your spouse is dealing with just as much stress while you're in school as you are experiencing, and it is going to be extremely difficult for them to essentially fly solo for two years. Some tips I was given: 1: Spending the weeknights staying by campus, even if it is within a reasonable commuting distance, can actually be a good thing. Obviously you will have more study time. It is too easy to get distracted by kids that want to play or helping with some laundry. Also, the spouse that is handling the household can sometimes have a harder time seeing you "sitting there" and not helping them out. Stress can surpass reason... 2: Always be aware of what your spouse at home is going through, and let them know that you are aware. A hug, a thank you, or other kind words of gratitude and support go a long way. 3: As previously mentioned, try to pencil in time for spouse/kids, but remember that it will all be for the better and it will be over soon. Focus on learning all that you can for now, its an investment your entire family is making into your, and their, futures. Don't mean for it to sound too gloomy for married folks, but the most consistent advice I have gotten from MD's and PA's is to remember the stress of the spouse as well. My wife is already stressed and I'm only in the interview process :) Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kevhow2001 Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 I'm not a student yet, but as a husband and a father of two young ones, I have researched it quite a bit in preparation. A co-worker who is about to graduate, as well as a current PA that I work with, both gave me very stern advice regarding our spouses during PA school. Both relayed to me the increased marital distress that many of their classmates experienced during the program, and how several even ended up divorced. Basically, remember that your spouse is dealing with just as much stress while you're in school as you are experiencing, and it is going to be extremely difficult for them to essentially fly solo for two years. Some tips I was given: 1: Spending the weeknights staying by campus, even if it is within a reasonable commuting distance, can actually be a good thing. Obviously you will have more study time. It is too easy to get distracted by kids that want to play or helping with some laundry. Also, the spouse that is handling the household can sometimes have a harder time seeing you "sitting there" and not helping them out. Stress can surpass reason... 2: Always be aware of what your spouse at home is going through, and let them know that you are aware. A hug, a thank you, or other kind words of gratitude and support go a long way. 3: As previously mentioned, try to pencil in time for spouse/kids, but remember that it will all be for the better and it will be over soon. Focus on learning all that you can for now, its an investment your entire family is making into your, and their, futures. Don't mean for it to sound too gloomy for married folks, but the most consistent advice I have gotten from MD's and PA's is to remember the stress of the spouse as well. My wife is already stressed and I'm only in the interview process :) Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OpSite Posted August 6, 2011 Share Posted August 6, 2011 Wow. I am glad I came across this part of the forum! I am a mom to a 2 1/2 year old, and I am agonizing on how I am going to do this! My husband is so supportive, he agreed that I should get a room to rent M-Thurs to saturate myself in school and studying, and then come home on the weekends to spend some time with the family. I live less than an hour away from school, but I just feel that the time commuting I could be studying (or sleeping!), and I wouldn't get distracted by my precious little one. Hmmm, nice to know that there are other brave mommies out there!!! That might not be the worst idea out there! Mom of four (teens, not tinies) just finished my first semester (they call it bootcamp for a reason). My commute is an hour each way. I had notecards in hand as I drove (not advocating, just saying), notes on the seat for when I stopped at lights, lectures on tape to replay. Many mornings I wished I had been closer to campus and didn't have to waste time driving. Nope, not a bad idea at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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