Rough Draft of Personal Statement, Any input would be helpful

[SDT83]

This is a rough draft, I have changed it several times and I'm not sure if it really makes sense. I have read several PS on here and they seem so much better. I am attempting to get rid of any cliches and at the same time make sure that it is passionate and really gives the schools a good understanding of why I have chosen to become a PA. Any input would be very helpful. Thanks

 

The nurse’s face promulgated her confusion as she said to the doctor, “I can’t get an IV in the left arm, and the right arm had no complications!” The doctor calmly and confidently explained to the nurse that with the drop in blood pressure getting a second IV was going to be much more difficult. My wife’s blood pressure had dropped several times that evening, and I was becoming terrified with thoughts of what would happen if the delivery team could not prevent further blood loss. It was at this time that her doctor noticed the apparent fear I could not hide, and calmly and confidently explained to me that my wife would be okay, and if the blood loss continued she would refer to the OR. I watched anxiously as the doctor and her physician assistant skillfully worked to ensure that the bleeding was slowing down. At this point I was reassured that my wife was in good hands and that her doctor had the knowledge and skills to not only ensure that my wife would be safe, but also the ability to determine when she may or may not need more acute care from a surgeon. This was the birth of our child, and everything had gone so smoothly up to this point I was amazed at how uncomplicated the delivery had been. Luckily my wife’s uterine muscle finally contracted and the bleeding stopped, and the fear of any internal tears were negated. However, without the quick thinking and incisiveness of the medical team giving precise and immediate care things could have gone much worse. As a family member of a patient in an emergency situation, there is no greater fear than the unknown of what might happen if the medical team is ill equipped to care for your loved one.

            I had been I  clinical setting before, caring for children with psychological and emotional problems, providing care for alcoholics and drug addicts who were physically sick due to lack of barbiturates their body had become accustomed to. However, this was the first time that I experienced what a specialist in medicine can do to save someone you love. It is an amazing and powerful thing, being able to combat death and disease with the skills, experience, and knowledge that one attains in their medical training. My interest in medicine did not start here however, my passion has always been in working with people and finding a way to make their life better, I have been able to do this in small way in my life so far. I have considered several options before choosing to become a physician assistant, including becoming a psychology, physician and a chiropractor. My life has also allowed me to experience many different industries and many different people; from working with psychiatric patients, drug and alcohol abuse counseling, to managing building projects and even biohazard cleanup. These experiences have helped me to mature and have also taught me a lot about leadership and most importantly the value of hard work and discipline. Although some of my grades in my undergraduate studies are less than desirable, I have learned through the years that I can achieve through diligence and hard work much more than through natural ability.

      Through shadowing various specialties in medicine, I have observed both doctors and physician assistants, chiropractors and physical therapists, this has given me insight regarding the responsibilities and scope of practice for each of them. I noticed that becoming a Physician Assistant will give me the knowledge and training to treat patients in need of both acute and chronic care, while at the same time having the specific skills set needed for my chosen specialty. These experiences helped to give me the insight and knowledge of various healthcare professions. However, it was due to the care that I saw exhibited upon the birth of my child galvanized my decision to become a physician assistant. Many times doctor, physician assistants, and nurses are not able to reverse the outcome of their patient. However, with the training that one acquires in the path to becoming a physician assistant I will be well equipped to treat patients even in the direst of circumstances. It is my hope that I can one day be able to provide the level of care and give my patients, and their loved ones the hope and security and moreover necessary treatment that the medical team gave to my wife, when she was in need.