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Personal Narrative - would appreciate opinions and commentary


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As my narrative is quite, well, personal, I would prefer to send it through a message or an email. My main concern is the actual content of the narrative, and whether or not it should be included. I believe that is mostly dependent upon one's opinion, but the more feedback I can receive, the better. Grammatical notes are also welcome. I would greatly appreciate any assistance. Thanks ahead of time!

 

P.S. As this is time sensitive, relatively quick feedback would be appreciated.

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