HELP! 6TH draft

[Dawnlee]

Seldom do we find that each thread from the chapters of our life come together to form a remarkable tapestry. How does a clinical psychology graduate student specializing in neuropsychology, finds herself deciding to become a physician's assistant? It would be impossible for me to narrow down the reason I chose this field, with one eye opening experience. Instead, I have personally experience many life events that have brought me to this decision. Some experiences in my life have been easier than others, but it has always been my ambition that has provided me with this opportunity.

 

I was diagnosed with congenital nystagmus and strabismus when I was less than a year old. I continued to work with physicians up until less than a year ago. I have undergone two surgeries, vision therapy, and I have learned that I am one of the fortunate two to three percent that can drive and function normally. I know what it is like to be a patient and how vulnerable it can be, but it has given me a greater empathy for those needing medical treatment. With any medical diagnosis you have the physical implications, but it is the psychological that seems to be overlooked. I faced teasing among my peers not only for my eyes, but also because of my socioeconomic status, and home was never a safe haven because my family had psychological diagnoses that were unbearable to live with at times. At 16 years old I was working as a nurse aide and I witnessed many patients who were clinically depressed and grieving over their diagnosis. Although there were challenges, I gained multiple grandparents, I was a part of team, my medical knowledge grew, and my ability to handle emergency situations well, was rewarding. Five years later as a counseling intern at the ______ Clinic and the Methadone clinic of _______ I was faced with different challenges. I listened to stories of soldiers coming home from Afghanistan with PTSD, and those who were struggling with opiate addiction because of an injury in combat. The stories were numerous and sorrowful, and my eyes were opened to the fact that addiction is an ongoing challenge for many Americans. At 23 I took a year off of college to help take care of my granddad because he suffered from vascular dementia, and ultimately passed last year from a hemorrhagic stroke. These experiences ultimately lead to my decision to pursue a master’s degree in psychology. I have always had a passion for anatomy and physiology, but I did not feel that I was prepared to be a physician assistant at this time, because not only did I need to deal with my own psychological well being, but I needed to understand psychological disorders in general.

 

For the last year of graduate school my courses have focused on neuroanatomy, psychopharmacology, organic brain impairment and neuropsychological assessment. I recognized more clearly that my interests became focused on providing medical intervention for clients, as opposed to psychological intervention. Providing assessments and counseling at _______ Center, a medically based facility has furthered my understanding of normal cerebral anatomy, physiology, as well as the pathological and recuperative responses that result from trauma. Furthermore, this position has given me the opportunity to work alongside physicians, physical therapists, and other rehabilitative specialists. I found that researching the circle of Willis became more interesting than researching therapeutic interventions for borderline personality disorder.

 

Ultimately is my goal to work as a physician assistant in an underserved county where help is needed. I found awareness in my studies which has been rewarding and much needed since I was a child. I found that all of my experiences were not a waste, but brought me to my decision to become a PA. It is my goal to be an empathic provider, to be educated in my specialty, to bring awareness and comfort to each patient, and to give back to the community.

[GaeaAM]

Hi Dawnlee-

 

Firstly I am sorry you have faced such struggles! Regarding the personal statement, I would say that you most notably need to work on grammar and spelling. In the first paragraph, you have "physician's assistant." It should be "Physician Assistant." There are other grammatical errors throughout that need to be corrected. Additionally I would focus more of your essay on why you want to be a PA, above all other roles in the medical field. Also the reader should be made aware that you understand what a PA's role in the health care team is.

 

Keep working. You are on your way there. It took me about 20 versions and many peers/colleagues/friends/mentors reading and helping edit.

[atheaslet]

I would try to narrow it down a bit. For example mentioning all the classes you have taken is not really needed in my opinion because other parts of the caspa application address that. Then you can talk more about how you fit well into the pa profession instead of rushing it at the end. That is just what I would do but if you don't want to change the essay that much I certainly can't fault you because I did like it.

[atheaslet]

I would try to narrow it down a bit. For example mentioning all the classes you have taken is not really needed in my opinion because other parts of the caspa application address that. Then you can talk more about how you fit well into the pa profession instead of rushing it at the end. That is just what I would do but if you don't want to change the essay that much I certainly can't fault you because I did like it.