Keep or delete this paragraph? Final draft!

[langer11089]

I'm debating whether or not the keep or delete the bolded paragraph. I'm worried it doesn't add enough to the essay to warrant its place in my personal statement. I'm not over the word count, so that isn't an issue. What do you think? Thanks!

___

 

Unlike some, I cannot say that I have always aspired to be a physician assistant (PA). Throughout my life, I have worked and volunteered in many different fields, but each experience has revolved around my passion and desire to help others. After learning the history of the PA profession, though, extensively exploring the career, and shadowing various PAs, it became clear to me that this is the career that I want to be a part of for the rest of my life.

 

As a teenager in high school, I had my heart set on working as a veterinarian so I volunteered at a local animal hospital. There I learned the power of compassion and empathy, in addition to patience and teamwork. My desire to be a veterinarian continued into my first year of college when I interned at the Animal Rescue League’s Wildlife Rehabilitation Clinic. It was here that I learned basic medical skills such as how to suture wounds, conduct comprehensive physical exams, and splint limbs. I quickly learned the importance of precision, quick decision-making, and dependability as I was the sole intern responsible for the well-being of the animals. One thing that was lacking, though, was the patient-health care provider interaction that I very much enjoy.

 

My focus on veterinary medicine shifted while studying abroad in Spain during my sophomore year. My host father, a urologist, gave me the opportunity to shadow him and sometimes even assist with patients. I assisted with an 11 year-old Gitano (gypsy) boy who was brought into the hospital after attempting to circumcise himself. As I conversed with the boy in Spanish, I gained his trust which was imperative for my host father to be able to treat him. When the bandaging was complete, the boy refused to let go of my hand. I took comfort in knowing that I was able to positively impact the life of a young child.

 

Working with Spain’s Gitano community opened my eyes to extreme poverty while it brought to light a career in health care.

A year later, I was sitting in the hospital as my grandmother battled the potentially lethal bacteria, Clostridium difficile. A woman, who I later learned was a PA, stood out to me among the rest of my grandmother’s care-givers. She conversed with my grandmother as she was a friend, not just a patient. Her witty, yet respectful personality brought a smile to my grandmother’s face. This PA possessed not only the medical knowledge and skills important for success, but also a certain sensitivity and relatability. These personal qualities exemplify what a PA is. I was so moved by the professionalism and likeability of this PA, in addition to the other PAs that I went on to shadow, that I now aspire to become a PA myself.

 

A career as a PA fulfills my life goals in many ways. I love that PAs have the mobility to shift among different specialties; this is one of the main factors that led me to choose the PA profession specifically. The length of schooling is also important in my decision because it allows me to begin a stable career in a reasonable amount of time, with a lesser amount of debt. The opportunity to see my own patients yet still work under a supervising physician continues to draw me to this profession. I believe that health care is very much a collaborative effort and through the cooperation between the PA and physician, this profession fits my ideology exactly. Teamwork is something that I thrive on and have had much experience with throughout my education at Wheaton College. The collaborative environment at Wheaton has undoubtedly prepared me for a career that allows me to work in groups.

 

Working toward becoming a PA came with my certification as an emergency medical technician (EMT-B). While acquiring the proper medical skills, I became very comfortable working alongside fellow health care professionals. Learning how to communicate calmly and effectively with patients are skills that will undoubtedly assist me in my future endeavors as a PA. After speaking with many EMTs and Paramedics, though, I realized that I desired a more constant flow of patients; consequently, I sought out certification and employment as a certified nurse aide (CNA) at a long-term care facility.

 

My career aspirations may have shifted half way through college, but this has only made me more comfortable with my decision to pursue a career as a PA. Through my medical experiences I have come to foster traits that characterize a physician assistant. My education at Wheaton College provided me with an excellent foundation in biology, including human anatomy and physiology. Attending PA school will continue to build on this foundation as it prepares me to succeed both as a PA and in life while positively impacting the lives of others.

[langer11089]

looking to submit today, any thoughts? thanks!

[mkels]

Have you actually found employment as a CNA? If so, talk more about that to return things more positive. As it is you en your health care experience on the negative side. If you haven't actually found work as a CNA then I would just stick to talking about what you LIKED as an EMT that pushes forward in the industry.

[langer11089]

Thanks for the help, I've revised it a bit to sound more positive. I do have a CNA job, however I am still in the process of becoming certified.

 

 

While training to become an emergency medical technician (EMT-B), I enjoyed working with fellow health care professionals to provide rapid treatment to patients. The excitement that came with entering a situation to treat an unknown condition highly appealed to me. I loved the focus that was placed on calm, effective communication with patients; however, after conversing with various EMTs and paramedics, I realized that I desired a position that would provide me with a more constant flow of hands-on experience with patients. Consequently, I sought out certification and employment as a certified nurse aide (CNA) at a long-term care facility. The patience, dedication, and drive that I acquired through my EMT training will help me to relate to and properly care for my patients while working as a CNA.