PA statement- any feedback will help!

[paphilly]

Any feedback/criticism would be a great help! Thank you!

 

 

“Can we get a stretcher?!” screamed the nurse from outside the waiting room. Several nurses, techs, the PA, the physician, and I rushed to the waiting room towards the patient, who was found unresponsive. “She was completely fine in the car!” said the husband frantically. She was not responding to verbal or painful stimuli and was rushed to the emergent side of the ED.  CPR was started immediately and the patient was hooked up to an EKG machine, which showed a STEMI.   From the physician to the PA, nurses and techs, everyone worked together. I was there making sure everything was documented as it occurred, such as medications ordered and administered, EKG, readings Cardiology consults, and CPR. Within 20 minutes, the cardiologist came in and the patient was taken to the cath lab. Fortunately, patient survived.  It was touching to see how everyone contributed to saving a person’s life.

Working as a medical scribe ensured my ambition of becoming a PA. During high school, I was more inclined towards science courses and always had a thirst to learn more about the human body and its intricate functions. As I continued on to a community college in Florida, I realized that being a physician was not for me and neither was being a nurse.  I wanted to treat and diagnose patients but it was very important that I keep a balance between my professional and personal life. My college advisor introduced to me to a career as a Physician Assistant. As I learned more about a career as a physician assistant, I knew this was my calling.  

 

I transferred my education to ****** University in Philadelphia to further my studies. The transition was difficult to get used to a different university structure, as well as living alone in a new city. But, I took it as a challenge and pushed myself to do the best. I took as many science classes as I could to further my knowledge. During the middle of my education, my father was diagnosed with a life threatening disease. This took a toll on me financially, emotionally, and physically and that was evident on my grades and GPA. However, I decided to work harder to reach my goal and decided to take classes as a post-bac to improve and show my commitment to this field.

 

As I graduated college, I wanted to gain more experience in the healthcare field and took advantage of a work opportunity as a medical scribe. This exposed me to the hospital setting on a very profound level. Although, I worked mainly with physicians, I got a better understanding of the role of a Physician Assistant and the functions. I had the opportunity to talk to and work with several Physician Assistants to discuss their experiences, as well as get insight into the positive and negatives of the job. As a medical scribe, I was able to experience how physicians and Physician Assistants work together and how they go about treating patients. I was able to interpret lab results, understand why a certain study was ordered for a specific complaint as well as how to handle patients on a psychological level. I dedicated my time and took on more responsibilities as I was always willing to learn more. After one and a half years, I was promoted to Chief Scribe due to my leadership qualities. This role allowed me to strengthen my leadership qualities further.

 

The good thing about being a Physician Assistant is the ability to work in various settings. I, also, wanted to get experience of Physician Assistant in a different setting. I shadowed an Cardiology Physician Assistant to further my knowledge and experience. This led me to a more inclination to becoming a Physician Assistant.  Also, I started to take classes to continue my education in the field of medicine.

 

I believe my personal experience and interests as well as my intellectual curiosity build a strong foundation in excelling as a Physician Assistant. I hope to attend a program that can’t sharpen my skills and nurture me into a well-rounded, professional Physician Assistant. I hope to use my past experience, thirst for knowledge, and commitment to make a difference in this field. I aspire to become a successful primary care Physician Assistant.  

 

[JSH]

A few suggestions to start..

 

Don't say what you DON'T want to be.. just explain why you want to be a PA. I would say instead of explaining who introduced you to it, just use some examples from your shadowing experiences and what you liked about what you saw and why it aligns with your career/personal goals. Same goes for you saying you talked to them about the profession and got to see what they do.. say what you liked about what you heard/saw.

 

You kinda lose me on the second to last paragraph... it seems kind of random. The ending could use a little work, too.

 

As an additional note, physician assistant does not need to be capitalized in this context.

 

Hope this helps!