My Narrative

[tfrering]

During high school, we think that all there is to worry about is if that cute boy will ask you to prom, how to get rid of that zit on picture day and eventually what college to attend when the experience is all over. But once it’s over, suddenly no one can tell you what to do, what major to choose or what you will grow up to be and that is when life begins. Unfortunately when I first attended college, I let people make those decisions for me, I let them decide that I should be a chemical engineer because I was good at math. It turned out I had no passion for math, no passion for my classes and certainly no passion to be a chemical engineer. Starting back at square one, I decided to pursue a Bachelor of Science in Animal Biology because I enjoyed the rigorous coursework, the flexibility in the study of medicine from Veterinarian School to Medical School to even Physician Assistant School. Finding my niche was important; it allowed me to be passionate about my education while challenging myself to perform on an increased intellectual intensity. However, how quickly passion faded as my life was struck with tragedy. In November of 2012, a loved one was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. After months of battling, the cancer finally won and my world was left in shambles. The experience communicated the impact of compassion, the feeling of defeat and aching for meaning in one’s life. Oddly enough the same memory which haunted me for the longest time led me to my desire of becoming a PA. Though the circumstances were extremely difficult, my interest in the role of medicine in the health care system blossomed. I began researching opportunities available in the medical field, speaking to both physicians and their assistants about each’s profession and began to learn about the journey which I now hope to embark upon. Since I was little I have placed immeasurable emphasis on the relationships developed between myself and those around me. I believe that establishing a well balanced relationship is vital to the creation of a robust team, and is portrayed in the relationship between a physician and physician assistant. While shadowing physician assistants, and working with multiple others, I experienced the unyielding trust that each place upon each other and hope to emulate this when I become a physician assistant. The PA- Physician relationship, with its extension to the patients, creates a pseudo family within an unfamiliar and intricate health care system. Under physician tutelage I, as a PA, could interject an innovative approach to tired questions while continuously being provided with a supportive environment such as a baby growing into a teenager in a family- as growth propels so do responsibilities and the potential to learn. Furthermore, when looking at the prospective model of PA school, I am delighted by the idea of a model which establishes its basis on the biomedical aspect of healthcare rather than the biopsychosocial model portrayed in curriculums such as in nursing. The physician modeled curriculum would allow me to focus on the assessment, diagnosis and treatment of diseases in the clinical environment while also highlighting surgical skills and procedure in improving the patient care experience. An added benefit of the physician assistant curriculum includes the focalization of the student’s education as general practitioners. This would allow for any adaptations or newfound interests I may encounter to be explored, experienced and my horizon broadened to include a vast amount of knowledge and possibilities with which the healthcare system contains. After discovering my passion once again, my grades began to improve and a year sooner than most, graduation from the University of Florida was upon me. Shortly thereafter, my desire to continue my education has prevailed in conjunction to receiving a job as a patient care attendant in the ICU. While working almost fifty hours a week in addition to taking multiple courses vital to PA school, I have accentuated my ability to juggle a rigorous schedule. Applying the information learned in the classroom to the workplace has helped me to not only retain the material but see the relevance in everyday life. Quickly I have begun to yearn for the time when I will make a substantial difference on the ultimate outcome of patients similar to those whom I attend to. The ICU has shown me a wide realm of situations, not one the same and yet everyone just as important as the last. We have seen 20 year old drug addicts, emergency intubations, cancer patients, diabetic ketoacidosis and unfortunately, the death of numerous patients whose treatments were beyond the abilities of medicine. In these situations I have proven to be both compassionate and caring. Yet, through research experience I have acquired punctual, diagnostic, oral and written communication skills along with the ability to analyze situations swiftly and proficiently; translating dexterously into medicine. I expect to service not just those in the ICU, but also in less fortunate circumstances in any part of the world. After completing PA school, I will prove to be efficient and empathetic in my work while remaining adaptable in my role as a reliable assistant. My craving to help those around me and hunger to learn will coincide simultaneously and my abilities will speak rather than credentials.

 

[JohnnyM2]

During high school, we think that all there is to worry about is if that cute boy will ask you to prom, how to get rid of that zit on picture day and eventually what college to attend when the experience is all over. But once it’s over, suddenly no one can tell you what to do, what major to choose or what you will grow up to be and that is when life begins. Unfortunately when I first attended college, I let people make those decisions for me, I let them decide that I should be a chemical engineer because I was good at math. It turned out I had no passion for math, no passion for my classes and certainly no passion to be a chemical engineer. Starting back at square one, I decided to pursue a Bachelor of Science in Animal Biology because I enjoyed the rigorous coursework, the flexibility in the study of medicine from Veterinarian School to Medical School to even Physician Assistant School. Finding my niche was important; it allowed me to be passionate about my education while challenging myself to perform on an increased intellectual intensity. However, how quickly passion faded as my life was struck with tragedy. In November of 2012, a loved one was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. After months of battling, the cancer finally won and my world was left in shambles. The experience communicated the impact of compassion, the feeling of defeat and aching for meaning in one’s life. Oddly enough the same memory which haunted me for the longest time led me to my desire of becoming a PA. Though the circumstances were extremely difficult, my interest in the role of medicine in the health care system blossomed. I began researching opportunities available in the medical field, speaking to both physicians and their assistants about each’s profession and began to learn about the journey which I now hope to embark upon. Since I was little I have placed immeasurable emphasis on the relationships developed between myself and those around me. I believe that establishing a well balanced relationship is vital to the creation of a robust team, and is portrayed in the relationship between a physician and physician assistant. While shadowing physician assistants, and working with multiple others, I experienced the unyielding trust that each place upon each other and hope to emulate this when I become a physician assistant. The PA- Physician relationship, with its extension to the patients, creates a pseudo family within an unfamiliar and intricate health care system. Under physician tutelage I, as a PA, could interject an innovative approach to tired questions while continuously being provided with a supportive environment such as a baby growing into a teenager in a family- as growth propels so do responsibilities and the potential to learn. Furthermore, when looking at the prospective model of PA school, I am delighted by the idea of a model which establishes its basis on the biomedical aspect of healthcare rather than the biopsychosocial model portrayed in curriculums such as in nursing. The physician modeled curriculum would allow me to focus on the assessment, diagnosis and treatment of diseases in the clinical environment while also highlighting surgical skills and procedure in improving the patient care experience. An added benefit of the physician assistant curriculum includes the focalization of the student’s education as general practitioners. This would allow for any adaptations or newfound interests I may encounter to be explored, experienced and my horizon broadened to include a vast amount of knowledge and possibilities with which the healthcare system contains. After discovering my passion once again, my grades began to improve and a year sooner than most, graduation from the University of Florida was upon me. Shortly thereafter, my desire to continue my education has prevailed in conjunction to receiving a job as a patient care attendant in the ICU. While working almost fifty hours a week in addition to taking multiple courses vital to PA school, I have accentuated my ability to juggle a rigorous schedule. Applying the information learned in the classroom to the workplace has helped me to not only retain the material but see the relevance in everyday life. Quickly I have begun to yearn for the time when I will make a substantial difference on the ultimate outcome of patients similar to those whom I attend to. The ICU has shown me a wide realm of situations, not one the same and yet everyone just as important as the last. We have seen 20 year old drug addicts, emergency intubations, cancer patients, diabetic ketoacidosis and unfortunately, the death of numerous patients whose treatments were beyond the abilities of medicine. In these situations I have proven to be both compassionate and caring. Yet, through research experience I have acquired punctual, diagnostic, oral and written communication skills along with the ability to analyze situations swiftly and proficiently; translating dexterously into medicine. I expect to service not just those in the ICU, but also in less fortunate circumstances in any part of the world. After completing PA school, I will prove to be efficient and empathetic in my work while remaining adaptable in my role as a reliable assistant. My craving to help those around me and hunger to learn will coincide simultaneously and my abilities will speak rather than credentials.

Oh my! You have to get rid of those first two awful sentences. High school is long over and you are no longer, I hope, a high school kid. Really, you are introducing yourself as a shallow individual work no mind of your own.

 

You go on from there to blame others for your choice of college major. Knock it off, already. OWN the mistake. Say you majored in Chem Eng because you were good at science and math, didn't know what else to do, and knew you would be able to get a good job with that degree. You could then discuss how college helped you recognize that you really enjoyed biological or life sciences which led you to transition to animal biology.

 

This idea that a loved one became seriously ill and/or died is why you decided to become a PA is such a worn and tired non-sequitur. It's like saying I once saw the Blue Angels perform at an air show and knew right away that I wanted to be a pilot. (Though I guess that works for a 10 year old.) It would be so much better if you could talk about how dealing with your loved one's illness got you involved with mds, PAs and rns and it was those contacts that helped you to realise you wanted to become a PA.

 

The discussion on what a PA does is to impersonal. The reader already knows that. The question remains: Why do YOU want to be a PA? What about that interests you? I really don't think PAs flit from EM to surgery to family practice to whatever, as a rule. You have to get good at something or spend your life as a medical dilettante. The skills and knowledge you develop while working are what make you valuable as an employee.

 

Your health care experience is much more compelling than the death of your loved one. Perhaps you should state that the death of the family member led to to explore medicine by getting that job.

 

What does, "I have acquired punctual ...skills" mean? If you are punctual that is a character issue, not so much a skill. "My craving to help those around me" is too melodramatic.

 

As a PA, you are NOT, NOT, NOT someone's assistant. PAs collaborate with a supervising physician. They aren't the md's assistant.

 

Sent from my Kindle Fire HDX using Tapatalk 2

 

[tfrering]

Thanks for the critique! I completely agree and see what you're saying. Ill revise and repost!

[DiggySRNA]

Looks like one big paragraph. 

A tip I was given when I just started my PS...make sure you write, re-write, and re-write about 5 times before letting anyone read your personal statement (first impression counts!!!!). The first, second, and even the third draft is like brainstorming. The fourth and beyond is when it gets interesting :D.

 

Comparing your PS to mine when I just started, you have better ideas. Just spend time constructing and building upon your theme before uploading it here. It will get annihilated (in JohnnyM2's case :P) if its in the same category as the other lackluster ones.

[JohnnyM2]

Looks like one big paragraph. 

A tip I was given when I just started my PS...make sure you write, re-write, and re-write about 5 times before letting anyone read your personal statement (first impression counts!!!!). The first, second, and even the third draft is like brainstorming. The fourth and beyond is when it gets interesting :D.

 

Comparing your PS to mine when I just started, you have better ideas. Just spend time constructing and building upon your theme before uploading it here. It will get annihilated (in JohnnyM2's case :P) if its in the same category as the other lackluster ones.

I will add that, at least she didn't start with something like: "The faint hoot of an owl drifted from the forest as the clock struck twelve...." or " Bam!. I never knew what hit me until I awoke two weeks later, to the acrid smells of disinfectant and alcolol in a native aboriginal hospital, staring into the beautiful blue eyes of the PA who became my inspiration for an amazing new career." Yech! The first line should get your attention but, as someone else on this forum noted, it needn't sound like a Harlequin romance novel.

[tfrering]

In 2011, college began. Starting out as a chemical engineer seemed logical to me; I had always excelled in math and enjoyed aspects of science. Quickly I realized that I had no passion for math and therefore, no passion for my classes or becoming a chemical engineer. Those first couple semesters did however help me to reassess and explore the various options with which the scientific background makes available. Starting back at square one, I decided to pursue a Bachelor of Science in Animal Biology. The appeal came from the rigorous coursework and the idea of helping those around me, whether that be animal or human. The degree contained flexibility in additional educational and job opportunities from Veterinarian School to Medical School to even Physician Assistant School. Discovering my niche was important; it would allow me to be passionate about my education while challenging myself to perform on an increased intellectual intensity.

In November of 2012, a loved one of mine was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Throughout the progression of the disease I began to learn about the field of medicine and my interest in the role of medicine again blossomed. During this difficult time medicine became an interesting and satiating distraction from the harsh reality which I was dealing with. My downtime hours spent in numerous hospital and hotel rooms were used researching opportunities available in the medical field rather than studying for exams or research for my studies. Unintentionally, I had been given me the opportunity to experience the impact of each member in such an intricate system. The duties of RNs, PCAs, PAs and Physicians ranging in specialties and responsibilities proved to be intricately intertwined yet vastly different. Unfortunately, the serendipity of my passion for medicine came incongruence with tragedy. After months of battling, the cancer culminated and I was left alone in an exhausted, defeated, and perplexing place with falling grades. While still heartbroken, I attempted to interpret the circumstances as revolutionary, more of a denotation to pursue a career in medicine and think of this as a way to remember and represent my loved ones impact on my life. I found the Physician Assistant profession to interlock both my passion of medicine and the importance of relationships and patients seamlessly and my once childhood halcyon of studying medicine had been reborn. When looking at the prospective model of PA school, I am delighted by the idea of a model which establishes its basis on the biomedical aspect of healthcare rather than the biopsychosocial model portrayed in curriculums such as in nursing. The physician modeled curriculum would allow me to focus on the assessment, diagnosis and treatment of diseases in the clinical environment while also highlighting surgical skills and procedure in improving the patient care experience.

Full steam ahead I dove into the process of becoming a PA, my grades began to improve and a year sooner than most, graduation from the University of Florida was upon me. This gave me an excellent chance to learn about the PA profession in-depth as less than a month after graduation I accepted a job as a patient care attendant in the ICU. I now work alongside various PAs and have had the opportunity to shadow others of different specialties. The process has only solidified my desire toward becoming a PA. The PAs which I work together with are compassionate, sophisticated, determined and passionate about their professions, all characteristics which I too contain. While working almost fifty hours a week in addition to taking multiple courses vital to PA school, I have accentuated my determination and ability to juggle a rigorous schedule. Applying the information learned in the classroom to the workplace has helped me to not only retain the material but see the relevance in everyday life and quickly I have begun to yearn for the time when I will make a substantial difference on the ultimate outcome of patients similar to those whom I attend to. I have also continuously placed immeasurable emphasis on the relationships developed between myself and those around me and believe that establishing a well-balanced relationship is vital to the creation of a robust team. By already having placed this quality of significant importance I will uphold the trust which is portrayed in the relationship between a physician and physician assistant. I have felt the pain of those whose 20 year old drug addict has to be intubated; 97 year old grandma finally succumbed to cancer or the spouse of the 28 year old suffering from diabetic ketoacidosis. The ICU has only strengthened my sense of compassion in providing me a wide realm of situations, not one the same and yet everyone just as important as the last. Yet, through research experience I have acquired diagnostic, critical-thinking, oral and written communication skills along with the ability to analyze situations swiftly and proficiently; translating dexterously into medicine. I have also traveled to places of less fortunate circumstances than mine such as in rural areas of Tennessee, Mississippi and Kentucky and seen the need for healthcare providers like PAs. In circumstances such as these I may have the option to be the primary care provider through an off-site physician. In addition, the idea of being able to work in all areas of medicine is alluring because it would allow me to gather a variety of proficiencies and specializations under the prospective physicians. Throughout my career I could have multiple areas of specializations instead of simply one such as in other healthcare professions while also having the chance to grow in independence as my skills accumulate. After becoming a PA I look forward to integrating my abilities toward helping those and under physician tutelage, could interject an innovative approach to tired questions. 

[tfrering]

Thanks y'all! I appreciate anything I can get, while a little encouragement is always appreciated sometimes the kick in the butt is needed. Let me know if I went in the wrong direction with this adjustment?

[DiggySRNA]

I will add that, at least she didn't start with something like: "The faint hoot of an owl drifted from the forest as the clock struck twelve...." or " Bam!. I never knew what hit me until I awoke two weeks later, to the acrid smells of disinfectant and alcolol in a native aboriginal hospital, staring into the beautiful blue eyes of the PA who became my inspiration for an amazing new career." Yech! The first line should get your attention but, as someone else on this forum noted, it needn't sound like a Harlequin romance novel.

Yeah...sounds like a great opening for my PS haha. No, I'm only joking.