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Need help with the essay. Please, help.


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Last year when I was about to take extra upper level classes, like genetics and organic chemistry,my husband came one day and said that he didn't have a job anymore. Crying but understanding I cancelled my classes and started looking for a job in healthcare without any education and training that would bring me closer to my dream of becoming a PA. I took an offer as a physical therapy aide because any paycheck would help my family survive. It wasn't much but how much inner fulfillment I got from seeing the results of recovery and happiness in patients faces.

I've learned not to judge and be sympathetic and most importantly be encouraging by saying: "Of course you will bend you knee and your pain will be gone soon." Although, most my patients are elderly who are lonely and pessimistic most of the time, I teach them stay positive and exercise at home at least simple things that would help them get up from the bed. Being in contact with patients every single day, I hope that being a PA will give me the same opportunity to be sympathetic to people's health issues and all my capabilities to help to relieve pain or health problem.

When observing a PA's role in real life, I thought it was so easy to work under supervision of a doctor, but it came out it was not when I started working as physical therapy aide under supervision of three doctors. It wasn't easy because I had to communicate the progress and report any changes in pain level right away. I couldn't miss a thing, even a touch of pain with any exercise that a patient does. All work which I call "the art-work" done through consecutive sessions of manual therapy and modalities would be messed up with a wrong move of human body part. My job taught me how to be a inseparable part of team to communicate effectively and be reliable and trustworthy to take over the responsibility from a doctor to act quickly and effectively. Only after working a year in my position of a physical therapy aide, I realized that my unchanged decision to become a PA led me to valuable experience of qualities that can help me to be successful as a PA.

Therefore, reflecting on my personal experience of multitasking through given follow ups by my doctors, I start to realize how effectively PAs do help doctors treat many patients at the same time effectively and quickly. I am glad that given such opportunity to work as therapy aide helped me grow capabilities to work under pressure in a team and remain calm and respectful and understanding to patients and my doctors.

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Maybe try to show this to a friend who can help with the grammar issues and sentence structuring to help you find a better flow. I think that your story of having to provide for your family is nice, and shows how hard you have had to work, and some help with the grammar will make it more understandable and increase its impact on the admissions committee. I think it would be easier to do this in person and you might find some places to add to it since its definitely well under the character limit, at least for CASPA.

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