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how to avoid telling boss where I'm moving to after resigning


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Hello everyone, 

I have a small dilemma. After graduating I had a hard time getting a position due to COVID and started a very busy family practice clinic. initially it wasn't too bad but they loaded me up with 4+ pts and hour even though i was told i would start seeing 2-3 when i got hired and would have support of the doctor if I had any questions which has not been very true. I  have been there for the past 6 months and recently got an amazing offer in pain management with an amazing doctor. I have put in my 2 weeks notice and talked with office manager about it however I know when I see the doctor in a few days she is going to ask me where I'm leaving to. I have heard from office staff that she has bad mouthed other providers when they have left and I don't know how to avoid her inquires about the new position as I know she is going to be confrontational. 

How do I avoid telling her where I'm moving to? 

Thank you for your help! 

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when they hired me it was a " per diem" contract.. it was a weird situation. basically it does't say anything in my contract about given any notice at all so technically I could have just quit but I was trying to be more professional. 

I already know shes going to be asking about details I just don't know how to dodge them. To be honest she's a bit of a bully. 

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just say you are not totally sure yet 

 

leave it at that

 

unless you are moving far away they will find out sometime anyways

 

DO NOT tell ANYONE in the office or even anyone else where you are going..... it always gets back to the person

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Three people can keep a secret if two are dead.

Don't tell anyone in the office or anyone related to anyone in the office. Tell the doc you are taking a little time off to consider several offers you have been given. If she asks what they are say "oh...I don't want to jinx it" and smile

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I say - be vague.

Just "I am looking at other opportunities to expand my career."

I know, kind of the "world peace" Ms America answer but it is polite and suffices.

If they think you are leaving with no other job - maybe one person in the office will think it is an issue that someone would leave just to leave.................

Stay true to yourself and move forward - don't look back.

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EASY !!!

YOUR ARE THE OWNER OF YOUR DESTINY AND OWE NO EXPLANATION TO ANYBODY IF YOU KNOW YOU ARE DOING THE RIGHT MOVE FOR YOU . IF YOU MUST SAY SOMETHING AND WANT TO AVOID A  " BACK STABBING" JUST SAY YOU HAVE AN EMERGENCY AND HAVE TO MOVE OUT OF STATE TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR SICK MOTHER. DON'T DROWN YOURSELF IN A GLASS OF WATER

 

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I never lie.

I also don't give people answers they aren't entitled to, either.

"Based on what I've heard you say about other providers who have left, I don't think I can trust you with that information" would be brutally honest, and if you're per diem, you can just walk out after having said that, but that seems too satisfying to say. 🙂

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I see lots of people here recommending lying.  Obviously it's a personal choice, but telling the truth and integrity go hand-in-hand and our profession requires integrity.  Therefore just be blunt...

 

edit: haha...it seems that Rev and I agree and at basically the same time

Edited by mgriffiths
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Having been in a similar situation: I agree with those who said to just be vague. You don't have to lie. If they push, just say you are not comfortable answering. If they ask why, again you say you are not comfortable answering.

It isn't going to be easy (as it was in my case) but you have to put on a brave face and just put your foot down and set that boundary. They do not own you and it is your right to seek employment elsewhere. It also has NO meaning for them to know whatsoever. It will benefit them in no way and you withholding that information is not a bad thing. Just chant to yourself: they don't own me, this is my right, I need to place my future first.

In jobs like that, your future means nothing to them and if they had to lay you off to put more money in their pocket, they would do it and give you 10 second notice. I may sound a bit cold, but it really is true.

One last thing: I agree with those who said not to say anything to your coworkers. Even if they're your friend in office. Bottom line: they will still be with the same boss you just left. They are still their employee. Your boss will likely ask them and they will likely answer to keep in good favor with their boss which you can't blame them for. So just keep all info to yourself and leave quietly, professionally, and gracefully.

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On 11/6/2020 at 11:13 AM, Pm1994 said:

recently got an amazing offer in pain management with an amazing doctor.

I've never seem those words together before!

 

Just teasing!  Good luck.  This can be a demanding field.  I wish you well.  Please let us know how it goes.

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