Personal statement review? Please help (I will review yours too :) )

[Laybunny]

Hi all! I'd really appreciate anyone who helps me review my statement. I'd be happy to review yours in return So just let me know if I can help or if you have any questions! Thank you!!

 

“Anneciğim” is the term I use for my grandmother. The term “anneciğim” is a Turkish term and translates to “dear mother”; the reason I call her anneciğim was because this is what my mother called her when I was very young, and therefore, I mistakenly thought that this is how one would refer to her grandmother. Anneciğim did a lot of the caring for me during my childhood; she spent a lot of time taking me to the mall, feeding me food grown from her garden, singing to me, and overall being an amazing caretaker for me while my parents had to work. She played an absolutely essential role in me developing my sense of morals and becoming the woman I am today.

When I had just graduated high school, anneciğim became ill with diverticulitis as a result of a C-Diff infection. During this time, I provided care for her in the same sense that she did for me when I was young. I stayed at her house, and I would do any tasks to help her until she became strong again and eventually made a full recovery. This experience was what awoke my love of medicine and passion for caring for patients, but my journey in discovering the physician assistant (PA) profession did not come as quickly or as simply. I was unsure if I wanted to pursue medicine as a physician, a registered nurse, or some other type of medical field altogether. When I expressed these thoughts to my mother, she had recommended becoming a PA, based on her positive experiences with her own PA provider. Curious to learn more, I visited my university’s guidance counselor, spent days studying the origin and the contributions of the profession at my local library, and even set up multiple shadowing experiences with PAs in different specialties.

The more that I learned about the profession, the more that I loved it and felt that this was what I truly wanted to pursue. I loved that PAs could extend healthcare to underserved populations, have a lot of lateral mobility, and can work in a variety of diverse settings. During my shadowing experiences, I was able to observe PAs educate patients and work collaboratively as part of a healthcare team, which are both characteristics of the profession that I highly value. However, in order to assess my feelings about interacting with a patient population specifically, I knew I would have to pursue more direct patient care experiences than my research and shadowing would allow. Therefore, I pursued a variety of experiences within differing environments; two experiences in particular stand out as having solidified my desire to become a PA.

One experience was from my time volunteering at Huntington Beach Hospital. I was still a new volunteer when I was delivering a menu to a patient's room, and I recognized that the patient was having anxiety. I informed the charge nurse, who told me that he frequently has panic attacks and that the nursing staff would be there to help shortly. Knowing that the nursing staff was very busy, I stepped in and began to console the patient through the panic attack. I sat on the floor beside him and reassured him that I would not leave until he felt better. He was having difficulty speaking, so I tried to find a way to calm him other than having a conversation. I noticed that he had several books in his room, and offered to read him one. This helped substantially, as he thanked me greatly and fell asleep after I read some of his favorite book out loud to him. This experience, as well as others at the hospital, highly reinforced my desire to serve others in a healthcare context. 

The second experience was from me working as a certified nursing assistant. One patient had a motor speech disorder, and it was challenging for the staff to understand him. I made a personal effort to try to have conversations with him; I realized that the more we talked, the easier it became for me to understand him. Eventually, I began to remember details about him; I mentioned how he graduated from an architect program and how his favorite song was the Green Acres theme song. Whenever I mentioned these things, he always smiled widely and seemed so happy that I put in the additional effort to understand him and communicate with him. This experience was meaningful to me as it helped me understand just how significant small gestures can be when providing patient care, and how fulfilling it is to make a difference with these gestures.

Numerous years have passed since that time where I cared for my ill anneciğim. I know that some things have changed; for instance, anneciğim’s memory is not what it used to be, and sometimes it is hard for her to understand me or for us to communicate. However, whenever I explain to her my goal of becoming a PA or the steps I am taking to achieve this goal, I see her eyes light up and she looks remarkably proud of me. It is these many experiences as well as anneciğim’s faith in me and love for me that I hold when I passionately and determinedly pursue my goal of becoming a PA.

Edited February 28, 2020 by Laybunny

[Janie55]

Hello- I read your PS a few times. It is written with good grammar, easy flow, easy to understand, but I think it could be much stronger and memorable.

Your first 3PP could be condensed into 1-2 PP.

Try to highlight your strengths better in each scenario you discuss.

Your conclusion should recap your reasons for choosing the PA profession and what you are bringing to the table that would make a program want you.

 

Edited March 10, 2020 by Janie55

[Laybunny]

9 hours ago, Janie55 said:

Hello- I read your PS a few times. It is written with good grammar, easy flow, easy to understand, but I think it could be much stronger and memorable.

Your first 3PP could be condensed into 1-2 PP.

Try to highlight your strengths better in each scenario you discuss.

Your conclusion should recap your reasons for choosing the PA profession and what you are bringing to the table that would make a program want you.

 

Thank you for your reply! I appreciate your advice and I'll try to do that