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djbenyamin

How do you feel about this Intro Paragraph for my PS?

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It would be easy to tell you about tribulations that I have overcome that lead to my interest in healthcare, but everyone has these hills to overcome. Although these tribulations did contribute to my desire of becoming a PA, this was not the only contributing factor. The greatest factor for my desire to become a PA began before I was exposed to what healthcare is and what healthcare professionals provide to this world.  It was a desire that began as a subconscious tangent, just out of reach. I was only a child, like many, pure by nature. With the purity of a child, the child never ceases to help those in need and does so with the entirety of their heart. Sadly enough, as we progress from our innocent childhood to our teens, then to our adulthood, the world diminishes this innate purity, piece by piece, leaving the most precious attribute of human nature, clouded and locked away. This continuous desire to retain the child-like purity is the reason for where I am today, and the reason for my pursuit to become a PA. With purity as the key component in mind, I hope you can understand who I am based on the decisions I have made. 

 

- Later would talk about:

1) my best friend committing science which sparked interest in science and medicine 

2) How being captain of college soccer team mirrored how PA's lead and held themselves to a higher standard and made difficult decisions

3) Helping a child patient with Ankylosing Spondylitis 

 

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Hello,

Your first sentence starts out good, but then the rest is just way too philosophical. I’d work on it some more.

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