PS draft help. Thank you!

[mayamarie]

I am not sure why it is conventional to enroll young children in a local soccer league. Perhaps it is the cute oversized jerseys or the adorable way they run around like misdirected ants. Never-the-less, I was one of those oversized jersey kids. Fortunately, I fell in love with the sport and all it had to offer. I played every year and eventually joined a club league as well as my high school team which was fortunate to win our state championship. During a friendly game my senior year, I suffered an upsetting ankle injury that would project my life into a different direction. After numerous doctor visits and countless physical therapy appointments, I returned to the field knowing that I would never be the same.

 

It was this event that lead me to an introduction to Brandon, a physician assistant who worked in my college town. While in my undergraduate program I was able to balance three jobs, tutor children in homeless shelters and maintain a decent GPA. During this time, I was also able spend a summer in South Africa volunteering in various communities, opening up my eyes and heart to other cultures.  I thought I had it all figured out but was admittedly undecided when the question of what I was going to do post graduation was proposed. After speaking to a counselor, I was set up in a program that allowed me to shadow a physician in the specialty of my choosing. Remembering the wonderful encounters I had while recovering from my ankle injury, I chose to shadow an orthopedic surgeon, Dr. Funk.  I presumed with a name like Funk, the experience would be entertaining at the least. I did not know at the time that he also worked with a physician assistant, Brandon, who was an alumnus of my university. I noticed that  Brandon in particular was kind to his patients, taking time to explain even the smallest of his decisions.

 

The fascination only continued as I was hired on as a scribe in my home town emergency department. Unaware that this was the second busiest emergency department in Los Angeles county and the third busiest in the state of California, I reluctantly accepted the position. To say that I was scared when I was first hired would be the understatement of a lifetime. All I knew of the ER was what was portrayed on television as my mother watched the dramatic long running series.  I decided to push forward and was reminded of my years of piano lessons and how a piece that was once intimidating was later mastered and played for an audience. During my time in the emergency department, I have had the privilege of working with kind and selfless providers. The PAs in particular have shown a kindness to their patients and an excitement for their profession unlike any other career I have known. They have been well-informed, team-oriented, humble and skilled. Due to the lack of medical services in the area, I have seen a large of volume of patients pass through the department with an array of acute problems to end stage diseases. Even with the high volume of patients checking in daily, the PAs continue to fully treat patients and inform them of their condition, aspiring me to also work in an underserved area.

 

Nothing captivates me more than communities. I love the way that different pieces are able to work together, much like the human body. I am continually intrigued by the way the body attempts to heal itself, but I am more so impressed by the way others are able to support that process. Weather by suturing a laceration to repair a patient physically, or by educating them on a reoccurring problem to help them mentally, PAs are able to be a part of healing the patient as a whole. Much like the workings of a human body, I appreciate the way that physician assistants are able to communicate with other physicians and nurses in order to treat patients. In nearly all aspects of my life, I have sought out opportunities that would challenge me and I desire a career that will do the same. To be a physician assistant would not only allow me to love and support those who are unable to help themselves, but will be the perfect combination of strength, determination and compassion all of which I believe I exemplify.

 

I have watched a number of PAs go the extra mile to encourage and assist those around them, weather staying late to help a coworker or check prices of prescriptions for the benefit of those less fortunate. I believe that I will be an outstanding PA and the events in my life have prepared me well for the profession. Growing up playing sports has taught me and allowed me to demonstrate team work; Playing the piano has trained me in the importance of working until the job is done; Continuing to volunteer in my hometown homeless shelter has given me an opportunity to express compassion; and juggling multiple jobs while in school has taught me time management and organization. With didactic and clinic skills, I hope to embody each of these attributes as I treat each patient I encounter wholly and proficiently. 

[NewPAS2019]

Hello, I will be entering PA school soon. Had multiple interviews and acceptances the first round. Just here to provide some basic pointers.

1. You mentioned you shadowed an orthopedic surgeon and encountered a PA there. However, I don't see the connection how that experience made you realize that PA was what you wanted to do. What did you see that made you know 'Yes this is what I want'? Did you talk to Brandon and found out what his job is like? 

2. In your third paragraph, you talked about your experience as a scribe in one of the busiest ER in California. You mentioned the PAs there were compassionate, attentive to details, and overall enjoyed their profession. What about the MDs, the DOs, the RNs, the NPs, the CNAs, etc who also works there. Are you to say that they are not compassionate or not satisfied with their jobs? Again, I see a lack of reasoning for why you wanted to enter the PA profession.

3. Overall a great rough draft! I like that you showed how you came across this profession. I also like how you pointed out what you like about the profession. My major advice is to provide more compelling reasons as to why you think the PA profession is the right fit for you over all the other healthcare professions.