Comments or suggestions??

[mmattson]

It was August 24^th, 1982 and my mother was 8 months pregnant. Suddenly the unexpected happened, her water broke. Excitement was the feeling in the air, another baby boy to add to the family. However, instead of being one of the best days of my mother's life, the next 24 hours would forever change her life, my brothers’ life, and of course my life, 5 years before I was even born.

 

My brother Kevin was born with Spina Bifida; it was a shock to my parents considering they had never even heard of the birth defect before. Although many would see having a brother with a disability as a negative, or even a burden, I have always viewed it as an incredible positive. The lessons and experiences I gained because of Kevin directed me to a career in the medical community.

 

Being Kevin’s sister I spent a lot more time in hospitals and doctors’ offices than most. They became a safe and comforting place for me, unlike many who view them as a source of anxiety. As a result I had the opportunity to get to know many of his caregivers including nurses, physical therapists, physicians, and of course, physician assistants. I was able to see different health care fields in action as I grew up. This put me at a huge advantage when deciding my career path. I want to be a physician assistant because of the level of care they are able give to patients, while at the same time the personal relationship that you are able to form with patients.

 

As a child with Spina Bifida, Kevin had to endure over twenty surgeries before he was 18 years old. Once, when he was 14 years old, he had to undergo a shunt repair. During this hospital stay one particular doctor, Dr. Morrison, a neurologist at Miami Children's Hospital, affected me an extraordinary way. I was 9 years old sitting by Kevin’s hospital bed, we were alone as my parents had run to the cafeteria. Dr. Morrison came into the room to talk with Kevin and my parents about the procedure. To this day I do not know what Dr. Morrison’s motivation was, but he saw that my brother and I were the only ones in the room and stayed anyways. He asked Kevin how he was feeling and if he had any questions. After, he looked at me and asked my name and what grade I was in; then he asked me something not one of Kevin’s doctors had before, he asked me if I had any questions about what was happening to my brother. At that time I remember thinking, well of course I do, but I replied to him, “I’m not old enough to understand”. He laughed and told me that putting the shunt in Kevin’s head helps him because sometimes there’s too much pressure in his head, like when you blow up a balloon too much, and the shunt limits the pressure, as if you were letting air out of a balloon. I exclaimed “Oh! I understand that!” and everyone laughed. I want to be in a position to comfort patients and families as Dr. Morrison did. Becoming a physician assistant gives me the opportunity to do just that. He formed a personal connection with my family and that is something that I believe physician assistants are given more opportunities to do. I want to be able to help patients with my medical knowledge, but I also want to be in a position where I have the time and opportunity to touch patients and their families on a personal level.

 

Another quality that spoke to me when deciding what medical path to take was really thinking about the words “physician assistant”. All my life I have been someone that strives for answers and knowledge. Working as a physician assistant puts me in a position to learn directly from physicians on a daily basis. And if that wasn’t enough instead of being trapped in a specialty as physicians are, a physician assistant’s career is dynamic. I will be able to move between specialties at different points in my career if I so choose. I believe this will make me a more well-rounded and educated caregiver as my career progresses.

 

My tremendous compassion for people and at times excessive ambition are the qualities that carried me through many of my activities and interests. Whether it is volunteering at Shands Hospital or working at the University of Florida Pediatric Genetics department, I believe that my compassion and empathy are the reasons I excelled at these activities. More importantly it is my ambition that got me to where I am today and that will get me to where I want to be tomorrow. When a person has a medical concern it can be a very scary and confusing time for them along with their families. I want to be a physician assistant because I know that I would excel not only in the science of medicine, but by learning from Dr. Morrison, I also know I would excel in the humanity of medicine.

[Just Steve]

A personal statement is a chance to get to know you a bit. This essay told me about your brother. Yes, I understand that it was his situation in life that brought you to medicine but outside of that what do you know of the profession? You gave one sentence in all of that to outline your personal experience working in medicine.

 

While I have no doubt that what your brother has gone through is worth several hundred essays, in this particular one you could reduce his input to about 2 sentences and write the rest about YOU. Once you are a PA student and a PA you can use his story to help educate many others. So save it for then.

 

What have you done to learn about the profession beside talk to your brother's care providers? Have you shadowed? Do you work with PAs? What direct patient care have u performed? What did your volunteer duties entail? What did you do with the genetics department?

 

Tell a story about you.

[IdahoPA]

I appreciate that this was written in a comprehensible, grammatically correct manner. But to echo the other gentlemen, it tells me almost nothing about you. Further, the majority of the paper could be a paper for anything, not specifically your motivations for becoming a PA. To me, this reads more like a med school app because of the strong connection you made with the doctor. (Which is fine; motivation can come from anywhere! But you have to demonstrate "why PA?")

 

It sounds like your understanding of the profession might be a bit limited. While PAs do learn from physicians (and hopefully other members of the health care team and vice versa), it could also be possible that a PA is working practically by him or herself. Do you have any experience working with or being around PAs?

 

You mention being a person of ambition, but haven't backed that up anywhere else. Why would you use that word to describe yourself?

 

I would love to read another effort. Good luck!

[mktalon]

I really cringed when you said that having a brother with a disability was a positive because of all you learned through all the experience. I know you don't think his disability is a positive thing. But when you word it like you did, it makes you sound incredibly self centered. Its one thing to say that your OWN disability is a positive thing because of who it makes you as a person. It is completely different when you talk about somebody else's disability as being a good thing because of what YOU get out of it.