Jump to content

Suggestions please! very rough draft

Recommended Posts

I have always believed that to whom much is given, much is expected. I have no sad story to tell, no life altering experience to describe, and no major obstacles that I have had to overcome. I have been very fortunate and have been given almost every opportunity in the world. I believe that it is my responsibility to do something good and productive with all of these opportunities. My father is a general surgeon and I have grown up watching him work and seeing the joy he gets from using his mind and his time for something so rewarding and it has always been my goal to do the same.

Like most people considering the medical field, I started out my undergraduate career wanting to go to medical school. However, I have come to realize that in reality, that isn’t the best choice for me. What drew me to the idea of becoming a physician’s assistant was realizing all the freedom that comes with that position. I really like the idea of being able to change fields and work in more than one area rather than having to specialize like I would in medical school. I am a very creative person and I feel like I will do better having so many options.

While I understand that there must be a standard by which to compare all applicants, I am afraid that my GPA does not adequately reflect my intelligence or abilities. Like many freshmen in college, I struggled with learning how to study. Coming from a smaller community, I wasn’t exposed to very challenging courses in high school and it took me a while to adapt. Unfortunately this had a negative effect on my overall GPA.

I will be graduating in May of 2012 and I hope to start PA school immediately. I understand that most people spend some time working in the medical field before they start their PA education. Having grown up observing my dad and his colleges, I feel like I have an adequate understanding of the medical world. I have worked in a surgical office since high school and while I didn’t work directly with patients, I did get a good behind-the-scenes view of how the practice ran. I have done some shadowing of other physicians and physician assistants in the past year and I am set up to shadow a family practicianor every week for the remainder of this school year.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Though I don't disagree with PAMAC's assessment, perhaps you will find these suggestions of some help.


I like your start, esp the first sentence. I would lose "no sad story" though, for the reason he suggests. Consider making the last sentence of the first paragraph two sentences; it's a bit long.


I would entirely redo from the second paragraph on. Keep in mind that the reader gets an opinion about you from reading this. So let's recap what you've told us: your dad is a surgeon (ok...), you have a poor gpa which you blame on poor study skills and from being from a small town where you didn't utilize your creativity to find challenging aspects of your education AND you've told us you have no real hardships to account for them, you feel like you understand the entire medical field from observing a small group of specialty physicians, and you don't realize that the profession is called "physician assistant." I also got that you didn't want to go to medical school because you wouldn't be able to select a specialty and stick with it. Is that true? Probably not, but that's how it seems set up.


I would focus on ways that you've "done something good"...volunteering and helping others. What have you learned from the opportunities you've been given that will make you a good PA?


Knowing how an office is run is not remotely the same as being able to hands-on treat a patient. Can you find an opportunity to work with patients? You mentioned wanting to go straight from school to PA school, but that really doesn't seem realistic, esp since you have no experience working with patients.


Own your mistakes. If you're going to mention them in a PS, explain how you overcome them so you won't make the same ones in an even more rigorous program like PA school. This gives you an opportunity to display maturity, something the original PS is lacking.


Just curious as to why you didn't take advantage of the 5000 character limit. I'm not saying fill your PS with fluff just because of a limit, but I don't feel like this told me very much about you.


Good luck on your re-writes!

Link to comment
Share on other sites


This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Create New...

Important Information

Welcome to the Physician Assistant Forum! This website uses cookies to ensure you get the best experience on our website. Learn More