AliB Posted November 5, 2015 Share Posted November 5, 2015 I just thought that *blank* ... *blank* ... *blank* (again) ... (still) *blank* ... WAS the response! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reality Check 2 Posted November 5, 2015 Share Posted November 5, 2015 Happy to amuse I am here all week Tip your waiters........ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jlumsden Posted November 6, 2015 Share Posted November 6, 2015 I had a patient who would say "electrical lights" for "electrolytes", even if you corrected her. I really liked her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Paula Posted November 6, 2015 Share Posted November 6, 2015 ^^^^^^ you're kidding. You mean it's pronounced electrolytes???? Wow, I need to clean up my vocabulary! My Mom keeps telling me about her Choresterol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reality Check 2 Posted November 6, 2015 Share Posted November 6, 2015 Don't forget about the Rotary Cup and Old Timers Disease...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
delco714 Posted November 6, 2015 Share Posted November 6, 2015 Prostrate. Most say it. Including some doctors. I twinge every tine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BARONEUS Posted November 7, 2015 Share Posted November 7, 2015 Patient with chronic knee pain with Medicare insurance, but paid out of pocket FOR SOME WIERD REASON says, "And make sure it's the Percocet without the crap in it, I got Hep C!" (gave her naprosyn) Person with a painful rash said to me: "I looked it up on the Internet, and it's gotta be either fibromyalgia, or cellulitis, one of the two." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator EMEDPA Posted November 7, 2015 Moderator Share Posted November 7, 2015 "sugar diabetes", you know, as opposed to sodium or potassium diabetes.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bk84nation Posted November 7, 2015 Share Posted November 7, 2015 "Wigworm" is our population's colloquialism for ringworm. Try as you might, most do not accept ringworm as a correction. I have heard "metropolitan" used in several instances to refer to Metoprolol. "Vomicking" is often used in place of vomiting, and many times it just refers to coughing up sputum, not emesis, and so always requires a follow up question. I have not personally heard this, but I did have an attending tell me a patient reported a hx of "gas-stational diabetes". If at any time a patient tells me that their pain is "excrutiating", my next question is med allergies... Oh, and all of my previous pregnancies had negative urine tests until I had the blood test, so can I get that now? And now that you ask, yes, I am dizzy, nauseated and I think I did pass out just a little bit. :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Paula Posted November 7, 2015 Share Posted November 7, 2015 I had a patient tell me he died and performed CPR on himself until he revived. When he realized he was dead, he took his right fist and thumped his chest and then did compressions until he came to. I was so relieved he did not wake up dead. There was no point in arguing with a hero. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Paula Posted November 7, 2015 Share Posted November 7, 2015 My husband asked me if women get prostate cancer too? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dmdpac Posted November 7, 2015 Share Posted November 7, 2015 My husband asked me if women get prostate cancer too? I had a woman present in tears because the internet told her she had prostate cancer. She was not easily convinced to the contrary. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
delco714 Posted November 7, 2015 Share Posted November 7, 2015 I had a woman present in tears because the internet told her she had prostate cancer. She was not easily convinced to the contrary.I've been lucky to not run in to a single woman who didn't know they did not have a prostate. Ha! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fishbum Posted November 7, 2015 Share Posted November 7, 2015 I had a female pt once who refused transport because the ED had "nicked her prostate" last time they disimpacted her. My partner and I just stared at our boots for a few minutes trying not to laugh. I guess that anatomy fail is a little more common than I would have figured. Also had a hernia guy similar to Paula's story...met me at the front door, naked from the waist down, holding onto his crotch saying "it popped out and I can't get it back in". It was after midnight and I was half asleep...took a minute to realize it wasn't a really weird dream. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator EMEDPA Posted November 7, 2015 Moderator Share Posted November 7, 2015 some special women might...you know, like bruce jenner Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reality Check 2 Posted November 7, 2015 Share Posted November 7, 2015 yesterday was one of those special days. I had several patients who are complaining of severe sinus infections for a total of three days. They had had nasal congestion, felt feverish and had a headache. I asked what they had taken over-the-counter for their symptoms. Their answer – nothing Here's your sign Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator True Anomaly Posted November 7, 2015 Moderator Share Posted November 7, 2015 yesterday was one of those special days. I had several patients who are complaining of severe sinus infections for a total of three days. They had had nasal congestion, felt feverish and had a headache. I asked what they had taken over-the-counter for their symptoms. Their answer – nothing Here's your sign It doesn't even make me pause anymore when I hear someone hasn't tried anything for their sx's. On the other hand, I actually like it because I have tons of useful ideas for them and am more than happy to send them home with a bevy of rx's to relieve their sx's. And I get a big thank you each time- but not before I counsel them on actually trying to help themselves Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GetMeOuttaThisMess Posted November 7, 2015 Share Posted November 7, 2015 To add to TA's post, I take pleasure in asking folks "Do you remember what I suggested for this same problem last month?". If a peds with a cough, and I've already suggested the honey trick (using it on myself at present and it works fine), Prelone for a couple days is my next trick. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator EMEDPA Posted November 7, 2015 Moderator Share Posted November 7, 2015 To add to TA's post, I take pleasure in asking folks "Do you remember what I suggested for this same problem last month?". If a peds with a cough, and I've already suggested the honey trick (using it on myself at present and it works fine), Prelone for a couple days is my next trick. SINGLE DOSE PO DECADRON 0.6 MG/KG PO iv SOLUTION AS po IS TOLERATED BETTER BY MOST KIDS. (woops sorry about caps...) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GetMeOuttaThisMess Posted November 7, 2015 Share Posted November 7, 2015 Ah, but rationalization doesn't come into play here. It "works better" if they have to take it for a couple of days. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sk732 Posted November 9, 2015 Share Posted November 9, 2015 I like "sticky note" Rx's for OTC stuff - they get a piece of paper with things that will at least make them feel better. I used to get them made by Vistaprint with my name and credentials on them. Reminds me, need to order a pile of nasal rinse samples again - the ER is out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reality Check 2 Posted November 9, 2015 Share Posted November 9, 2015 I used to have this sweet but daffy older lady who came in with her pocketbook - an overstuffed grandma wallet bursting with little pieces of paper. She would always refer to them while I took her history and tried to figure out why she was there. Most visits could have been settled with tea and cookies........ she was very sweet and I would have talked to her all day. I could tell from most of her articles and clippings that they came from the Enquirer or some other stellar publication of medical knowledge. She pulled a clipping out one day and says "Can you prescribe this for me? I would like to use it when I feel my heart skip instead of having to take a pill." It was a home defibrillator. As I stifled laughter into a cough, I told her that the defibrillator could only be used by someone else and that one would usually be dead and couldn't use it on yourself. You could talk very plainly to her and she appreciated that. She balled the paper up and chucked it across my exam room and laughed like no tomorrow. "Guess I won't get one of those..........." Made my day! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miaow Posted November 10, 2015 Share Posted November 10, 2015 "It took 21 days of antibiotics to finally clear up my cough!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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