Jump to content

Personal Statement Feedback Please


Recommended Posts

Need to submit this soon, could really use a review to see if I need to change anything. please feel free to rip it to shreds if need be, Thanks !

 

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

             “Scalpel..Spreader..Clamp..Cardiac massage..Book an OR,” the physician shouted. Watching in awe, as a hand was placed inside this patient’s chest, I sat memorized by the severity, yet beauty of the situation. This patient’s life literally was sitting in the hands of the medical staff, hanging by a thread, an extreme portrayal of the beauty of medicine and the journey it had succumbed to over time. As the medical team raced by headed for the surgical suite, I stood face to face with the engine of the human body, expanding lungs, a beating heart, both engraving themselves into my mind. 

 

              As a new radiologic technologist this emergency thoracotomy was a life changing experience. I was there to do a chest film, if necessary, never had I seen or imagined the impact an emergency thoracotomy could place on my perception and outlook of my future. This was not just the first emergency thoracotomy I had seen, but also the first realization of the true limitations and scope of my current career. 

 

             Beginning my medical journey as a radiologic technologist has opened up an insatiable hunger and determination to achieve my goal to become a physician assistant. Working at a level one trauma center hospital, constantly exposed to a kaleidoscopic environment, only fuels this hunger with an unpredictable roller coaster of gunshots, stabbings, surgeries, motor vehicle accidents, and disease. Situations that I wish to do more, but I am restricted by my scope of practice. Pneumonia, infection, fractures, innumerable situations in the emergency department or hospital floors, where I wish to make an impact. Countless days hanging back, running the C-arm machine in the operating room, itching with desire behind my mask as I watch doctors and physician assistants work magic with their hands, perform miracles, and fabricate shattered bones into restructured masterpieces. Thinking, knowing, that could and will be me in the future. 

 

           My career in radiology has given me a remarkable knowledge of anatomy, excellent critical thinking skills, and an operational mode of information processing that I believe will translate well into the physician assistant profession.  As a radiologic technologist, I provide visible insight into an anatomical world otherwise unknown. However, my interaction with patients last mere minutes usually, I long to play a greater role in a patient’s care. Of all the medical professionals I have encountered in my years in the healthcare field , the physician assistant profession has continued to astound me. During my time shadowing and working in the hospital, I have seen numerous physician assistants playing the hero I wish to become. The ability for physician assistants to obtain detailed history, provide personalized care, order tests, diagnose, and prescribe medications to their patients presents the paradigm of medical care that I thirst for. Everywhere I turn I encounter a physician assistant; the ability to work in an emergency room, primary care, neurology, cardiology, pediatrics, or surgery, not only intrigues my interest, but ignites my ambitions to become a physician assistant.

 

          The growing desire to do more, be more, and change more is what will make me a great physician assistant. I know my skills will be utilized more effectively, when I become an intrinsic component of the diagnosis and treatment of a patient’s care. As a physician assistant I hope to touch and change as many lives as possible. My lust for a greater knowledge, more autonomy, collaboration with physicians, specialty flexibility, and increased patient interaction, tell me this is the ideal career for me.

Hi!

 

I am by no means an expert on personal statements, and I don't know if this is your general CASPA statement or specific to a school but is there anything non-professional you can talk about as well? I don't know if you had volunteer experiences that you felt introduced you to at risk or undeserved populations (or life experience). I think your statement is very passionate about the PA profession and the reasons why you want to pursue becoming one, but beyond that I don't really get a sense of you. I included some of my background, where I grew up and talked about my family experience (some of it more relevant then other parts).

If you have experiences that you could draw on that show your involvement with the community or the area you wish to serve (rural, ED etc..) I think those can all give a better personal appreciation of you. What made you become a radiologic technologist? What other exposure to the health care field have you had? Can you talk about shadowing?

 

I like it, and I think its passionate, but I feel like I didn't really get a good sense of you.

  • 2 weeks later...

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Welcome to the Physician Assistant Forum! This website uses cookies to ensure you get the best experience on our website. Learn More