Jump to content

Recommended Posts

You guessed it! I am a first time applicant and you guys are the only ones that can help me with critiquing my personal statement. Im actually pretty surprised I stayed under the character limit for my rough draft. Please look it over and tell me how bad it stinks!

 

 

 

The door flew open and slammed against the adjacent wall. The room was dark and all I could make out were figures and the noise of chatter and children crying. As my eyes adjusted to the sharp contrast in darkness from the blaring sun outside, I made my way to the counter. “Sign in,” said a voice and I looked down to see a chewed up pin and a pile of ripped up pieces of paper, on which I wrote my name and date of birth. The voice came out again “have a seat; we’ll call you when we’re ready.” I turned to see a room, no bigger than a two bedroom apartment, full of young women and children of various ages. I took a seat and waited for my turn to be seen at my local health department.

 

As an adolescent without health insurance, I have seen first-hand the demand for providers that can offer available healthcare. My experiences at the local health department made me dread going, never knowing if I would see the same provider again. Like many others in my situation, I just stopped going. After these experiences, I knew I wanted to be the stability for the underprivileged and financially burdened.

 

I began my role in healthcare as a pharmacy technician. It was this job that solidified my interests in the science of medicine. It was also this exposure which showed me that primary care providers play a huge role in the health system. However, it was not until I began working in registration for the Emergency Department of my local hospital that I could see just how important this role is; patients sitting for hours to be seen for a fever and headache because they do not have any other option for healthcare.

 

These observations pushed me to continue in medicine. After moving home to pursue this career, I climbed my way from a unit secretary to a patient care technician where I had my first hands-on experiences with patients. I remember a particular incident where while I was assisting a patient to the bathroom, she began sweating and complaining of blurred vision. I immediately called for someone to come in so I could check her blood sugar levels; it was 37 mg/Dl. With the nurse by my side, we got Ms. Kay safely to the bed and began treating her with intravenous glucose. I was so excited and proud of myself for recognizing the symptoms and being able to react without hesitation. It is moments like this one that I recognize my desires are not only to treat patients, but also diagnose illnesses.

 

After working closely with many health providers for nearly ten years, none stood out to me like Mike, a physician assistant on the cardiothoracic surgery unit. I have seen him take the extra time to go over every medication a patient had not only to ensure there was no drug interactions but to explain and write down the uses of each for when they returned home. When this patient needs a refill, instead of asking for “the little blue pill,” they will confidently ask for their blood pressure medication. Understanding these problems and taking the time to address them through patient education and support can greatly improve the quality of life for those in our communities. PAs help to carry out this idea of preventive medicine over episodic care as a team.

 

A team-based care system is very important to me. I learned the value of a solid support network while struggling after the death of my cousin. The pain of losing my best friend, and the personal disappointment I felt after failing two semesters, made it difficult for me to continue on my career path confidently. However, with the backing and trust of my peers, much like a PA in their practice, I was able to push forward and overcome these trials. I was taught stress-management and determination through these hardships and they will aid me as I endeavor this challenging and evolving career as a PA.

 

With my professional training in the medical field, I have a good understanding and appreciate everyone’s roles in healthcare. We come from several backgrounds and experiences that allow us to integrate together and ultimately provide better patient care. I am confident in my ability to translate my skills into my studies as well as future practice and become a successful PA. I am also confident in my ability to relate and help close the gap in available healthcare as a primary care provider.

  • Upvote 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The first paragraph seemed like a great start to a momentous story but then I was a bit let down when it ended. It does paint a great picture of your experience there but since there is no real continuation, I don't think it's necessary. Unless you have a good and relevant story to finish it off with?

 

I really like the rest of your PS, though!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree; I was having trouble with the ending. Would it be better to just cut the intro and write another or try to tie the original story into the conclusion? I almost feel like the intro doesn't fit the tone of the rest of the paper. Any thoughts??

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Try cutting the intro and coming up with something else. I agree that it just doesn't fit the rest of the paper. In lieu of the intro, I think you can mention 1 line or 2 about how having those experiences has made you want to provide stability as a provider the way that you never had it. I think the ending is fine.

 

Maybe someone else can help us out with other suggestions.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


  • Similar Content

    • By pursuitofPA
      I am currently finishing up my didactic portion of PA school and considering the amount of loan debt I will have, I am considering enlisting into the airforce or navy after completing PA school in 12/2020.  I was previously an Occupational Therapist though I am not sure if that will matter regarding pay etc. If anyone has advice regarding this process and details on loan repayment, I would greatly appreciate it.
    • By taecson
      I don't really comfortable speaking this frankly to my colleagues. None of my close friends or family are in the medical field so they don't truly understand.  I am still a somewhat new PA and I am already considering a new career path. I went to PA school 2 years after graduating college, so I don't have any experience in any other fields besides healthcare. But I've been having serious thoughts about quitting my job and quitting the medical field altogether. A little background about me, I am in my late 20s and I have been a practicing PA for about 4 years. During this time I have been at the same practice, a specialty and internal medicine office. There are several physicians, but I am employed by one. I see patients in the clinic, in several acute care hospitals, and at nursing homes. Although I like the variety and the types of patients I see are very interesting to me, there are downsides to the job that just become more apparent every day. I work M-F 9-5 and 2 weekends per month. I have to take round at the hospitals and take calls on those 2 weekends, plus take calls 3 weekdays out of the week. I often work 3 weekends a month, and occasionally even 4 when my contract technically says 2. 
      My supervising physician is retirement age and he refuses to retire and instead delegates more and more tasks to me. For example, sometimes if he is too tired / lazy he will tell the staff to just transfer patient appointments to my schedule. Patients are understandably upset when they made an appointment with the doctor they've known for years and get switched to the schedule of a PA they don't know. I feel like "as the PA", and an employee of the doctor, I pretty much get saddled with all the grunt work and undesirable tasks that he doesn't want to do. I know in other settings PAs are treated with a little more respect and not just given the busy work to do. There are some upsides, I do like my SP, we work well together, and I feel like I can honestly and freely discuss patients with him without judgment. I also know that he may retire in a few years so this job won't be permanent either. I don't know if getting a new job will help.
      I applied for two separate jobs that I did not get. One was a family practice M-F with no call/weekends and the other was an allergy practice M-F with no call/weekends. Getting rejected for both of those jobs really discouraged me and made me feel trapped at this job. It won't be easy to find a new position.
      I get frustrated with patients too. It just feels like there are so many patients who are med seeking. Some providers in my area were recently sentenced to prison time for overprescribing narcotics. They were reckless with their prescribing and I am quite careful, but the fact that jail time is in the realm of possibility for our profession constantly looms over my head. 
      Patients also often want to be on disability when they clearly do not need to. There are so many patients wanting DMV disability placards and getting irate when I tell them they don't qualify. In addition, patients whose licenses get revoked want me to sign off on them being safe to drive when there was a clear reason the licenses were revoked. Again, I am on the receiving end of the brunt of their frustration and anger when I say they need a specialist clearance. There is just so much liability in our career field and so much stress involved. Liability is always there medically too. YOUR decision can affect whether a patient LIVES or DIES and it's so much stress that I have actually developed my own health issues secondary to the stress. 
      I have had a patient stalk me and become obsessed with me. He wrote me unhinged letters and made many calls to the office describing my car, etc. We had to get the police involved and I considered filing a legal restraining order. I know this is possible in any profession, but it feels like healthcare can be personal and intimate and patients can get the wrong idea. I again contemplated quitting the profession at this time.
      I have looked into other careers such as being a pharmaceutical representative, working in research, being an accountant, ANYTHING other than this. I have contemplated quitting and just living off my savings until I figure it out. I have talked to some colleagues to an extent, many are much older and have been PAs longer than me. I sometimes question if I'm just being an entitled millennial who wants life-work balance early on in their career until I realize that it's not normal or common to work 24-25 days in a row. It's not normal to only get 4 days off a month (if that. Some days I would get 2 days off a month.) I actually finally told my SP I was considering leaving because I was too burnt out. He trivialized my concerns and said "Why are you burnt out? You're young. I have been doing this for 40 years." Which is true, but this wasn't the life I envisioned for myself. After talking, he did acknowledge my concerns, and he hired an NP who can help me with the workload and guaranteed that I will only have to work the 2 weekends a month as outlined in my contract and I did get a raise. (I still feel like I'm underpaid which is a whole separate story.)
      Sorry for the essay, I just really needed somewhere to air out my frustrations with other people in my career field. Thanks in advance for reading.
    • By Lifeline10
      New program pending accreditation. Good luck to all the prospects that are applying!
    • By aksidoti
      Hi everyone! I knew that Duke's supplemental application would be a beast, but I was just curious if anyone had experience with the patient care and shadowing tabs? Here is what I am struggling with: 
      - PATIENT CARE: can the description be the same as on my CASPA? And what exactly should I be putting for the agreeable and disagreeable aspects of my responsibilities? 
      - Shadowing: can I put the same descriptions as my CASPA? 
      Thanks guys! Best of luck to everyone!
    • By Habb31719
      I wanted to know if anyone could add any input on this; 
      I had requested a PA for a letter of evaluation. He was happy to agree to give one. I also had sent him a copy of my resume just because I thought that was the appropriate thing to do. 
      last week at work him had mentioned two things... he had brought it up to me that I didn't have my GPA posted on my resume and asked if if I was planning to put it on my resume. he also started asking me things like "do you want me to just not address GPA at all then?". So, for the copy of the resume I had sent to her, I didn't put my GPA in because I didn't think it was going to be helpful (my undergrad is a 3.35 which is not competitive) The whole purpose of sending him a 1 page resume was so that he could know a little more of what I have done in undergrad; like, have a little more amount of information of who I am outside of scribing. (I've been a scribe for about 9 months; about 5 of those months have been heavily involved with this particular PA, so although we haven't had many conversations personally its not like I am a stranger to him 
      The other thing that he requested is if I had personal statement finished. I will sincerely admit, I am quite behind on the application process as my personal statement still has work to do; I told him it's still being written. He asked if she should have a summary of it or something like that so he has more details to flesh out his evaluation letter. 
      I told her I would email her about the GPA issue and the personal statement summary because he was asking out loud in front of the other doctors and employees in the nurses station and I was a little shy to answer. I don't know why, but I wasn't expecting him to ask those questions.
      So here is what I was asking: 
      1. Should I have 3.35 on my resume at all? (I was a public health major)
      2. Is giving a personal statement/summary super necessary for you LOR evaluators? Because I really have alot more to do on my PS so I'm not sure how I can make a good summary in a short amount of time to give him; as well as the other evaluators.
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Welcome to the Physician Assistant Forum! This website uses cookies to ensure you get the best experience on our website. Learn More