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First draft. Any help is much appreciated!

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It was a beautiful fall Friday night, perfect for a small town football game.  It was my senior year and I could not wait to hit the field. It was a close game and being the senior captain I felt the need to make a big play. The next play, I saw the ball carrier coming right for me. I lowered my shoulder and made the play. However my shoulder was hanging about three inches lower than it should have been and oh man did it hurt. I tried to tell my coach to leave me in the game. I did not want to walk out on one of my last games. I tried one more play, and then it was off to the emergency room.

            The drive there was one of the most stressful of my life. Was my football career going to end early? I was scared to hear what the doctor had to say, until I got there. The first person I saw was a Physician Assistant. He asked what he had to about my shoulder but he tried to talk to me more about how my season was going and keep my mind off of my worries. He could tell that this was an emotional visit for me. He ordered and X-ray and he came back in with a doctor. They both explained to me that it was only an AC joint separation and what my options were. I got to play the rest of my final season. They turned what I thought would be the worst doctor visit of my life into an experience that helped shape my career path.

            When I say I am from a small town most people do not think too much of it until I tell them I graduated with only 36 people. Jaws are usually hitting the floor at this point. The town of ******** is a small farming community.  My father is a third generation farmer as are many other people in the area. Being the only boy out of four siblings, I have always felt the pressure to become the fourth generation. Do not get me wrong, I love helping my dad and I take all the chances to bond with him while I still can, but I have always known that I wanted to do something else.

            I love the community I grew up in. The rural atmosphere has shaped my life. I learned that when someone is in need you help him or her in any way you can.  When you live in a community like mine you see this first hand. The physician assistant that saw me apparently also learned this lesson somewhere in his life. He knew I needed someone to talk to and he was that person.  He helped me in more way than one.  I knew I wanted to help people the same way that this man helped me when I needed it.  I figured medicine would be a good way to achieve this goal.

            I went into college not knowing exactly what type of medicine I wanted to go into. I started working towards a degree in Biomedical Sciences.  Having my experience with that physician assistant in the ER in the back of my head, I decided to look a little closer at the physician assistant field and I was able to set up a job shadow.  I was able to sit in on several surgeries and also got to observe in a clinical setting.  Seeing how the MD and Physician Assistant worked together was amazing to me. The OR was a well-oiled machine; they were efficient in deciding the best plan of action for each patient. The clinic was a similar story. The Physician Assistant would see a patient and if he had even the slightest debate with himself about what to do, he would consult the MD. The two of them weighed the pros and cons of each option quickly and effectively and always agreed upon a solution they both thought was right.  I have had a few other shadow experiences since and I loved all of them. 

            As I continued my college education I took the opportunity to work as a CNA at ********** in *********.  To some people this is thankless work, but they have never experienced it. Working in this field has really taught me how to approach people with health concerns. Sometimes they need a break from the constant worry about their health. You have to really take an interest in the patient’s life to understand what they are going through. Each patient requires a different approach.  This is something that should be applied to the physician assistant field as well.

            I thought that football injury was about the worst thing that could happen to me at the time. It’s funny how that event inspired me pursue the career I am today. Every event in our lives shapes us in some way. I am hoping that I can return to the small community that shaped me and return the favor as a physician assistant. 

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...Physicians Assistant worked together was amazing to me. The OR was a well-oiled machine; they were efficient in deciding the best plan of action for each patient. The clinic was a similar story. The Physicians Assistant... 


Hello! Welcome,


You should change this before the senior PAs and PA-S (PA-Ses?) rip you a new one on here for that silly mistake lol

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You should say Physician Assistant (not Physicians/Physician's Assistant).


Other than that, it is a good start. You should clean it up grammar wise and share more of your CNA experience. Include why you chose PA over all the other health professions with great backup and reasoning. 


Your shadowing experience should be very brief so place more emphasis on your health care and community service experiences.


Include what your goals are as a PA career wise. 

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