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  1. Hello all , I'm a recent graduate from UTRGV Class of 2017, Passed PANCE February 8th and now officially a PA-C. Im passionate about sharing my journey in every aspect and I have a blog. Below i shared today's blog if its something you enjoy please follow my blog and email me im here to help melissa-gutierrez.simplesite.com Face your Fears- Live your Dreams I have noticed a constant pattern of the e-mails I've received . Either for people applying to the program , people in the program , or people preparing for the PANCE fear is something that I get constantly asked. Fear of not getting an interview, Fear of not getting into school , Fear of Failing during the program , Fear of preceptors , Fear of not being prepared for your clinicals, FEAR of failing PANCE. I myself have gone through ALL THESE STAGES OF FEAR. But I've learned that FEAR Is the # 1 reason one fails. Fear paralyses us and clouds our judgement. Let me share a personal story. I've share with you all my ANXIETY. But my anxiety truly stems from fear of failing . About 2 weeks before my exam I had a complete breakdown , My husband was the only one who witnessed it. I usually bottle in all my emotions and then POP, I burst . I was getting upset about I don't know what, But in reality I wasn't upset about anything other than I was anxious about my exam. He brought that up to me and said "I think the whole issue is your test." And He was right. I was in a full out anxiety panic, Crying, hyperventilating, nauseaus, and I felt so vulnerable. I didn't understant why I was so scared when all I did was Study ! Reality was no one was pressuring me but myself, I demanded perfection. In person majority of people see me as a happy, bubbly, posiitve person and really that is the best side of me, But when I get anxious I become the opposite. I was so scared of failing , I felt if I failed , I would fail my parents, sister, husband , friends, professors , and patients I made connections with. When my support system would say something positive to me I would freak out , like if they were adding pressure on me but they weren't. I WAS. During this panic attack, I thought ot myself how is my husband dealing with this so calmly? I would be irritated with me If I was him . And He told me " What's the worst case scenario , you fail this exam. So what you take it again. " I remember him tagging me on a facebook post , It was a statement NFL Football Player Russel Wilson said , it states : " I don't see this as pressure. My dad in coma and my mom tyring to help him, That's pressure. This is football , this is something I love. " My husband constantly reminded me that yes It was stressful but I GET TO practice medicine , that's a blessing. Once I started seeing it in that light, studying for this exam is pressure , it's what I got to do so I get to do what I love. Seeing my patients sick, seeing my patients pass away, having to tell someone they have cancer that's pressure , this exam isn't pressure. When you start feeling bad for yourself and allow that to take over you aren't you anymore. My advise is wake up every morning with a purpose, what has helped me is waking up every morning and looking for a positive quote and live my day off that. When I feel that anxiety creeping up, I have to remind myself of everything I have and I get to do. YES I was scared, every minute and second up to the point of when i found out I passed I was scared. BUT I've learned that in moments when you are scared and unsure those are the moments to kneel down , bow your head and pray. GOD has never failed me , even when I think im not deserving he surprises me and shows me his love abundantly. I don't know what I have done to have all the blessings in my life but I do know that every day I thank GOD for my blessings. KICK FEAR in the face and GRAB hold of your FAITH. YOU CAN DO THIS , Do NOT give up. No matter the challenges. You will get there, it may not be when you want It but it will be right when its supposed to happen. Today's quote of the day: BE FEARLESS IN THE PURSUIT OF WHAT SETS YOUR SOUL ON FIRE.
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